Cole quotes from Ninjago

Jay

Oh, no. There's more paths? How am I supposed to know which way to go?

That's what makes it a maze.

Jay

Now more walls? This maze is cheating!

Jay

Cole, you're my friend, but right now you're my worst enemy. You have no idea how time travel works.

If someone goes back in time and alters the past, our reality as we know it would change. We could look totally different and not even know it.

Jay

But we don't. Thus, Master Wu must have slipped into a time stream into the future.

Whenever he is, it's been a year. It's time we find him. [walks up to a monk] Uh, hi. Sorry to bother you. Cole, Master of Earth. This is Jay, Master of Blabber.

Jay

Lightning.

We heard that an old man who lost his memory wandered in from the cold. About so high, long beard, drinks a lot of tea.

Jay

I told you not to introduce yourself as the Master of Earth. No one knows what that means.

No, you bolt head, everyone here took a vow of silence.

Jay

[turns back to the monk] Can you point us to him? [the monk points] Thank you! I like your place! [he and Cole see a man] Wait, if it's him, and he lost his memory, don't remind him of that stupid TV show I once hosted, okay?

Uh, Master Wu?

Jay

Oh, come on, we came all this way, and it's not him? Aw, th-that's it. I quit.

I'm tired of losing people in my life. Wu would never quit on us, and we're not quitting on him.

Jay

If he's really still out there, couldn't he at least send a letter from the future, or leave a message to stand the test of time? He's wise. He'd find a way.

We just have to keep looking.

Jay

Yeah, you do that. And while you're at it, I'll be doing something more useful, like being a ninja.

Ha! Some ninja you are. You talk more than you fight!

Jay

At least I'm entertaining. All you do is judge and act like you know everything!

Would you stop fighting?!

Kai

[sees Lloyd] Hey, there he is. You're late.

Zane

Kai was late too, if it is any consolation.

Lloyd

Thanks for meeting me here. It's been a while since we've all been under one roof. [Nya giggles and Cole nudges Jay] What?

Jay

Are we gonna talk about it?

Lloyd

Talk about what?

Your voice, it's—

Zane

[deep voice] Lower.

Kai

Sounds like our little ninja's growing up.

While you are in our service, you have full access to the complimentary royal buffet. Anything you want is at your disposal. Exotic fruits, assorted vegetables, scones, and all-you-can-eat cake.

Ah, thank you, but I gave up sweets. My body is a temple.

Jay

Ever since Master Wu went missing, Cole has been a real party pooper.

Zane

[confused] Party pooper?

Jay

I'll explain later.

Zane

Can we discuss now what is a "party pooper"?

Jay's upset I'm the responsible one. With Master Wu gone, someone has to keep us in check.

Zane

In that case, you are correct. You are responsible. It is nice to have a pooper at the party.

Harumi

Forgive me, but is that... underwear?

Jay

[takes the underwear and laughs awkwardly] We're usually more organized. But our leader got lost in a time stream... They're Cole's.

They're blue!

Kai

[laughs] You're lucky they're not yellow.

Ninja. Hmph. What do you two want?

Zane

Luke Cunningham.

Otherwise known as the Man in the White Mask.

Zane

We would like some information regarding who you work for, Luke.

Well, I'd like a pepperoni pizza and some chocolate ice cream, but it ain't gonna happen.

We don't have that, but we do have a cup of hot tea that could warm you up.

I ain't thirsty.

[drinks tea] Mm, it really warms me up. Sometimes a cup of hot tea just hits the spot.

Like I said, I ain't talkin'.

Drink it!

No!

Oh, don't you get it? If you don't drink the Tea of Truth, we won't get answers! [realizes what he just said] Oh... [covers his mouth]

[looks to his tea then to Cole] You trying to trick me?

Zane

Cole, I think you drank the wrong cup!

I see that now. [gives the Tea of Truth to Zane] But in full disclosure, I'm trying my best to look like I didn't. It's not working, isn't it?

Ha! So you can't lie, huh? Oh! You pee in the swimming pool?

Oh course! Who doesn't- [covers mouth]

Heh! Where are you hiding the Princess?

Oh, the Destiny's Bounty in a cove off Hollow's Bluff- [covers his mouth again] But tomorrow we'll be at the village of Stiix.

Zane

You're giving away our secrets!

I can't lie!

What sort of power does the Green Ninja have?

It's some kind of energy, or green light. I dunno, like, all our Elemental Powers rolled into one. Who can say? Zane! Knock me out! Do something!

[laughs] Wait till the gang at Laughy's hears about this.

Zane

"Laughy's"? You mean the karaoke club on the south side?

[stops laughing] Oh...

Haha! Who's the sucker now? Good thing I didn't tell him about my fear of singing. Oh, Zane, can we please get out of here?

Lloyd

Maybe he's thirsty. Give him some milk.

I tried. He doesn't like milk.

Jay

What else do babies drink?

Kai

Don't ask me, ask him.

He's a baby! He hasn't learned how to talk yet.

Jay

Oh, maybe he needs a diaper change.

Oh, my gosh, do we even have diapers?

Lloyd

Why would we have diapers? We're ninja.

Jay

Ooh, maybe we can use one of our hoods instead.

Kai

Not my hood.

Lloyd

We'll draw straws. Loser gives up their hood.

Harumi

[singing to the baby] The spider's in the house, sleep sleep. The spider bit the mouse, sleep deep. Don't wake up or else you'll find a spider in your mouth.

Wow, you're really good at that.

Harumi

Nah, he's just tired. Too much excitement. He'll go to sleep now.

Proximity alarm. Something is approaching the Bounty fast.

Nya

Onscreen.

It is Samurai X.

Oh. He must be here to help us out.

I'm afraid that is unlikely.

Lloyd

Why?

Because my system is overrun.

Kai

You're making no sense, P.I.X.A.L.. What are you talking about?

This would be a good time to make a minor confession… I am Samurai X.

Kai

What? Are you serious?

Nya

How is that possible?

Lloyd

How can you be Samurai X?

Jay

Totally called it!

You did not!

Jay

Did too!

Jay

[sees the baby] Cole? Hehe. I thought you put the baby down for a nap.

You mean little Cole Jr.? I did, but he was pretty restless.

Jay

Uh-huh. Yeah. Then why is little Cole Jr. standing in front of me and passing me the pliers?

Uh... Cole Jr. is walking now? I don't know much about babies, but are babies supposed to walk?

Kai

No. No, they are not. And I don't think they know what pliers are. [the baby blows on a cup of tea to cool it, then drinks it] And they definitely can't do that.

Jay

Okay, now I've seen it all. Now I really quit.

Ninja never quit. [laughs]

I know that phrase....

Jay

Uh, guys, I don't think that's Cole Jr., that's Master Wu!

Nya

Commissioner!

So good to see you.

Kai

There's no time to lose.

Sorry to barge in, but it's really quite urgent.

Zane

We have to vacate the city.

Jay

We need weapons, lots and lots and lots of weapons.

Crabby!

Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa. One at a time. Just shoot it to me straight: what's gonna do me in?

Pardon? Do you in?

Every time something bad happens to the city, first thing they do is can the police commissioner. So what is it this time? Subterranean mutant insects? Indomitable flesh-eating zombies? A pirate genie?

Pirate genie?

Yes, why not? Anything can happen in this crazy town.

Kai

[finds foil under the Bounty's debris] Foil. I found foil! Ah! Yes! We have foil!

Zane

[grunts as he sets up a radio] Okay, let's see if it works.

Say we're lucky enough to reach someone in Ninjago. After everything that's happened, is there even a home to go back to?

Kai

One way to find out. Here goes nothing. [flips a switch on the radio]

Zane

And that sounds like nothing.

Kai

Ugh, we're never getting home!

Jay

[calmly] So it doesn't work. I'm telling you guys, I've been feeling so much better now that I've accepted our situation. This is our new home.

You don't sound like yourself, Jay.

Jay

I'm just saying you don't have to freak out about it. Heh. It could be worse.

Kai

Worse? Worse!? A strange tea lady just marooned us in the Realm of Oni and Dragon. A realm, mind you, we know nothing about, with no hope of getting home, and no clue as to what else is out there!

Jay

Uh, Oni and Dragons, duh?

Sure, Jay. We've all seen Dragons. But aren't you the least bit concerned about coming across an Oni? I mean, we hardly know anything about them.

Zane

Except that they like to destroy, and Master Wu is part Oni.

Jay

[laughs] Ah, man.

Kai

You not freaking out… is FREAKING ME OUT!

Jay

Kai, baby, it's much easier coping with life's problems when you let go of hope. [slides down a plank] Whoo-hoo! Hey, turn up that music. That's my butter and jam. Yeah-ha!

Yeah, he's totally lost it.

Jay

Nope, I've totally found it!

It won't fly.

Jay

It has to.

I'm too heavy. Maybe your calculations were off.

Jay

I designed it to your measurements. Have you gained weight?

[gasps] I have given up cake, and my body is a temple!

We're getting closer to the Firstbourne's nest. We will eat when the Son of the Spinjitzu Master has the Dragon Armor, and we are all in Ninyeego.

Zane

It's Ninjago. It's really not that hard to pronounce.

Kai

Oh, to be back home, in a real bed.

Jay

Mmm, with real food.

And cake. Why did I ever give up cake?

Jay

[snorts] Because your body is a temple.

What is this, cake?

Imagine all that is good, baked into warm and moist. Then add a sweet, sugary frosting, that's cake.

You sound excited, but are you ready for what lies ahead.