Mad quotes

It's okay, Bella. I'll help you.

Call 911...

[to the viewers] What, take my shirt off and use it as a bandage?

Eat-Ohs: What were they thinking?

[figuring the right password at the ATM] Wow. I have zero imagination!

Oh, my sandwich! [gets the sandwich, drops the pickle] Oh, no! I dropped the pickle! [two zoo animals attack him]

[wakes up from his nightmare about animals chasing people in the theater] Oh; phew, it was just a dream! Well, that's why I say let the past stay where it is. Always come up something original. (goes to typewriter) A annoying dad, a screwed up family, and a talking animal... no, alien... no, animal. (chuckles) Yep, original.

The left hand of doom!

Now with a couple magic pair of left-handed scissors!

That's not part of the... [groans]

I don't know how many times do I have to tell you, no more stapling 20 pages at a time! [stapler talks gibberish] I can't understand a word you're saying.

[wakes up from his nightmare about swollen in the pit] Wow. I just had the weirdest dream that I was starring in a crazy version of Tintin. I wonder what could have brought that on.

I don't know, but get back inside that TaunTaun. The shelter's not up yet. And I thought these parody's smelled bad, on the outside.

Koopa Soup! For a limited time, so jump on it while you can! [Mario enters, jumps in on one of the flavors] That was an expression!

Hey, I got an idea! We should... [burns out]

What was your idea?

Eh, I lost it. God, I hate that!

Oh, man! Monday? I hate Mondays!

Oh, man! It's Tuesday and the weekend's over? I hate Tuesdays!

Hey, move over! It's cold out here!

We the jury found the defendant not guilty.

Steven, I thought I told you to mow... [before he finishes his sentence, Steven sprays him] Aah! It's wet! I hate that! Ah, forget it. I'll mow the lawn.