TV show quotes
All I need for you is to settle your current legal matters. We can't go into business with you with bad press.
Earnshaw says if we settle, we open ourselves up to lawsuits--
We don't care about more lawsuits. With a billion people in the workforce, a few deaths won't raise an eyebrow.
Government won't crack down?
Mr. Quint, it takes five years to get a parking permit.
I literally cannot make this slower or any more boring. Okay? You know why they say Justice wears a blindfold? So you can't see that Justice is asleep.
I am sure there's reservoirs of boring you have yet to plumb.
[Skip to Hardison presenting his case]
Slide 162, this is, this is good stuff. Dr. Goldferb, hi, can you tell us how the chemicals work their way into the neurotransmitters?
Is this going anywhere, counsel?
Oh, I assure you, Your Honor, the next 100 slides are essential.
What are we supposed to do now?
We win the trial.
Wha—I'm sorry, the impossible trial? The trial that can't be won?
Yep. That one.
A jury is 12 people. Just talk to them. You've been doing it your whole life. Just put on your bow tie and ring the doorbell.
I'm-I'm sorry.
For what?
Me. You deserve better.
You're the best lawyer we ever had. Thank you so much.
You know, a week ago, you were all strangers. And then the same thing happened to all of you. You got that envelope. You know the one. Comes in the mail, it says "County of Los Angeles" on the top. You open it like this, "Oh, god," you know. A week passes, you watch the witnesses parade through. You listen to the lawyers argue, suddenly, you're not strangers anymore. Some of you have even made friends. It's not as bad as you thought, right? But then the judge asks you to deliberate. Then you have a moment of doubt. "I'm not a doctor, I’m not a scientist. How can I tell if Ernesto Vargas died from using Fastlife? How-how-how can I be sure?" But that envelope entrusted you with the most important obligation of citizenship, and that is to find the truth. It's so important that we dare not give it to one person but to 12 strangers. Now, all I ask is that you-you go into that room and you work together and you find the truth. I have faith that you'll reach a just decision.
We take a juror, and our juror gets removed. We take their lawyer. Another lawyer shows up. A company tries to take Quint. I take the company. It's almost... [looks at chess piece] It's ridiculous.
Did you realize what you just did? What you did? You won a jury trial without cheating.
Without chea--I hacked a government no-fly list and used it to humiliate a witness.
Excessively. "Cheating excessively" is what I meant. But, I mean, think about it, I mean, if you applied yourself, Hardison, you could be anything you want.
You know what? I could. I could. You know, next week, I think I’m gonna be an astronaut.
Well, that's not really what I meant. I meant if you studied, you’d--
Yeah, if I--Who needs to study? You know, I’m gonna be a surgeon. A surgeon--ER. Surgeon.
Alice made a friend!
I'm gonna tell you one more time. You made a friend. Not "Alice."
Oh. Cool! Well, think she'll want to go steal a painting with me?
Start small, Parker. Try coffee.
[Nate is pointing a gun at Blackpoole]
Are you here to kill me, Nate?
Not tonight.
Well, in that case, come in. There's shrimp. [walks away]
I do love shrimp. [tosses gun away]
My wing in the museum opens this weekend. Little celebration for the fundraisers.
Yeah, blood money buys the best art.
Are we still unclear? I'm a functioning alcoholic, you know? And the trick is not to get hung up on the "alcoholic." But celebrate the "functioning" part of the sentence.
You're getting worse.
This--this is messing you up, man.
[reading from a notepad] We can't keep watching you do this to yourself.
Is this my intervention?
[team throws their notes on the table]
Man, am I glad I don't have to break in there. That is one sick security system.
What, with our tools? Give me three days of prep, it'd be like taking diamonds from the French National Bank. That's like taking candy from a baby.
I got it.
A very easy thing to do.
Got...it.
Oh, look, little buddy. [picks up fake statue] That's your new home!
Can you please not play with the little naked man? Please.
I'm not. [sets the statue down]
Nate. Why did you come to me?
Well, I knew you'd pay the best price. Renaissance art is your life. Guilt was a bonus.
You hate me.
Yeah. Of course I hate you. I mean, what--what? You think I want to be here? I don't have a choice, all right?! I'm drunk, I’m broke, I'm living out of my car, I just want the paycheck, and at this point, I don't care where it comes from.
[Eliot and Maggie walk up behind Nate]
Nate?
Maggie.
These quotes come from Wikiquote's Leverage pages and are available under the Creative Commons Attribution-ShareAlike License.
