HHyde
[referring to Tom] The doctor... is out!
Security! Get security in here now!
HHyde
He's out of my head - hallelujah! Home alone.
“Episode Five” · Season 1, Episode 5
In this episode: Hyde (15), Claire (6), Peter (2), Colonel Hart (1)
HHyde
Oh, this feels good - roomy! Look at all this space; I could put up shelves!
HHyde
[talking about Tom] Search me, love, he was in here a minute ago. Turn my back and whoosh, not even a tip on the dresser - men! Oh, this feels so peaceful, love it. No more boring little doctor yapping away in the corner. Honestly, you have no idea; "don't do this," "don't do that," "don't kill her," "your turn to shave," and if I had another argument about who was biting the fingernails - Oh! Did that bug you, the fingernails, did he do that when he was with you? We should talk, you and me - we're fellow sufferers, we should have a cup of coffee and have a good old chin-wag about him. The wife, and the ex, girls together, all friends now - the bastard's dead.
HHyde
The thing about consuming an alter-ego, a bit like Chinese, a minute later you're hungry again. Hello boys!
SScientist
Basically, you may not be stabilized... It's for your own good, basically.
HHyde
Okay Mr. Basically, talk to me like you know me again, in public, where people can see, and the next sound you hear will be your own neck snapping. Do we have a basis for communication?
HHyde
I can smell your sweat. [sniffs air] Vegetarian. [sniffs air] Ruff! You've got a dog. Woof woof! Two dogs, big dogs. I vant to say Alsatian...
Is he correct, Colonel Hart?
Yes sir, he's correct
HHyde
[puts finger on Colonel Hart's face then licks his finger] Mmm! Tasty! 57 years old. Ex-smoker. Gave up two years ago... [checks the taste in his mouth] Yep, two years ago, two years... [looks down, voice growing softer] ...and too late. It's started already, hasn't it? Rustling away down there, growing in the dark. Hello Mr. Tumor, goodbye daylight. [beat][perkily] Am I right?!
Is he right, Colonel Hart?
Yes sir, he's right.
HHyde
'Course I'm right! Two years, I'd say, then it's night night Colonel Cancer. [mock salutes] Sir!
Stop that!
HHyde
Oh ohhh, it's the missus!
[Hyde discovers he can see Tom's memories]
HHyde
I've got rewind. Look at that. I've got digital rewind - It's like Sky Plus in here!
[Hyde watches a memory of Claire about to undress for Tom]
HHyde
I finally found the adult channels.
What does that mean?
HHyde
You know the way you sometimes think men are mentally undressing you? [Leers at Claire] Peanuts!
[Claire slaps him, which causes Hyde to see a new memory]
HHyde
[Complaining] She switched channels!
HHyde
[Holding Claire] Let's give him a memory he's never gonna be able to live with!
You just buckle up, he'll come back... killing me won't be enough.
HHyde
Oh, honey, not nearly enough...
I changed my mind.
HHyde
Know the feeling.
HHyde
Okay-dokey, you first.
Why me?
HHyde
Fantastic arse.
SScientist
Excuse me, who are you?
HHyde
Oh, that's a point, better kill you.
HHyde
Trust me, I'm a psychopath!
[Hyde tries to remember if Tom ever had a helicopter flying lesson]
HHyde
Wait, he had a lesson - yeah, he did, I thought he did - I've got him sitting in a helicopter. No it's a moped, no it's a helicopter.
Oh Jesus Christ.
HHyde
Actually could have been a horse. [Shaking his head in a vague way] His attention really wandered, didn't it?
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