Hawaii Five-0 quotes

Steve

You gonna open the door?

Not a chance.

Steve

I'll be back.

Danny

"I'll be back?" [to Big Lono] He's done a lot better, trust me. [To Steve] That's all you can come up with is "I'll be back?"

Steve

I've got something- I've got something good. [Goes outside]

Danny

What are you gonna do, Are you gonna drive the car through the... Hey, I got the keys! Quieres llaves? [to Big Lono] You see what you did? I don't know what he's gonna do. But if I were you: I'd run out the back, side, roof - go! [Steve returns with a grenade] A grenade? He has a grenade. Why do you have a grenade? He's got a grenade. You see this? He's not bluffing? He will pull the pin and blow everybody up. Will you trust me, please?

That thing's not even real.

Steve

You gonna open the door?

Not a chance.

Steve

Sure? [Lono refuses to budge] Okay. [sets up grenade on screen lock]

Danny

You're not bl - You're not bluffing.

Steve

Go, go! Move!

Danny

That is so sick. [Steve and Danny run outside as the grenade goes off; Danny is stunned at the explosion] Come on!!! What is the matter with you?!? You need help! I will pay for it!

Kono

What are the real chances of getting these kids back alive?

Steve

When my father was kidnapped, I knew from prior experience that no matter what I did that day, the results would not be good, okay? In these situations they rarely are... We're gonna change that. We're gonna get these kids back. We're gonna get them back alive!

Kono

[visits a bar full of coeds on spring break while checking leads] Four year-college tuition, $200,000. Books and supplies, $5,000. Room and board, $25,000. [sees unconscious patron] Passing out with two cocktail olives up your nose...

Priceless.

Matt

We can hang out for the day and meet you for dinner. What do you think, Grace?

Grace

Yeah.

Danny

All right. But listen, no funny stuff. No trouble, okay?

Grace

I won't.

Danny

I know you won't. I'm talking to him.

Matt

Our parents would say, "Where's your brother?" and Danny would say, "Guess we lost him."

You are horrible, Danny.

Danny

Yeah, well, I always came back for you, didn't I?

Danny

[to Matt] Listen to me. Who do you think you're talking to, huh? Think you're talking to one of your dopey clients. I'm your brother! You don't lie to me!

Matt

What do you want to hear? That I took the money? Fine! I took the money!

Danny

[about his brother, Matt] Well, be warned. Mr. Wall Street has quite a personality.

Steve

Runs in family, huh?

Danny

Disorder. Personality disorder.

Matt

You gonna shoot me, Danny?

Danny

I should shoot you. You stupid son-of-a-bitch! Laundering money for drug dealers? What the hell's the matter with you?

Steve

[to Danny] You stop for malasadas?

Danny

No.

Steve

You got evidence for a case?

Danny

Nope.

Steve

Alright, stop, stop. What's in the bag?

Danny

My, lunch, genius.

Steve

Your lunch? Okay, what'd you bring?

Danny

You got to know every detail of my life? What's it to you what my lunch is?

Steve

Cause you don't want to tell me! What, you think it's so fantastic I'm going to steal it? You fly in some deep-fried sandwich from New Jersey I'm not allowed to know about-

Danny

Salad, okay? Just a salad. That's it. There's nothing else in here. Grace has been taking a nutrition class and she is concerned about my cholesterol so I promised her I would eat better. Okay?

Steve

That's actually incredibly sweet.

Danny

Why did you not just give her your files right then and there? What is your play, please?

Steve

Must you know every detail of my life?

Danny

Hey, this is the CIA you are dealing with here, okay? They wrote the book on advanced interrogation techniques, which I am absolutely positive you have sitting on your bedside table right now, okay? Just so you know, I understand, okay? I would not mind a little one-on-one session with Jenna Kaye. The thought does stimulate my imagination, too.

Steve

Legally, the CIA can only interrogate foreign nationals.

Danny

[looks at Steve deflatedly] Why do you do that? I had a little fantasy worked out. I mean, you're, like, a devourer of dreams. You know what I mean, like, you eat them. Like a little Pac-Man in cargo pants.

Steve

[about a snow globe] Why would you steal this?

I've always wanted to go to Paris.

Steve

It's a beautiful city and if you go, you should pick yourself up a snow globe because that is Seattle.

Danny

[to Johnny] That's the Space Needle, not the Eiffel Tower, you schmuck!

Kono

"You don't find Johnny. He finds you."

Danny

You're gonna quote this schmuck now?

Kono

I can spoof Tiffany's cell and make it look like she's sending him a text.

Danny

Lure him here. I like it. But move over please. Because I'm gonna do this. Because it should be very filthy and you're a young lady.

Steve

[to Wo Fat while waiting for Jenna Kaye] What makes you think I won't kill you right here in this restaurant?

Wo Fat

"The man who strikes first admits that his ideas have given out." Old Chinese proverb.

Steve

[has a gun aimed at Wo Fat under the table] "Say hello to my little friend." Old American proverb.

Danny

With all due respect, what's wrong with an old fashioned baseball game, Steve? Huh?

Steve

Never been to a professional baseball game.

Danny

That doesn't surprise me at all.

Danny

This is not a hike, Steven. Your dad used to bring you up here?

Steve

Every year.

Danny

That explains a lot.