Is there a George Lopez here?
You got it, man.
So you're George Lopez?
If we're playing 20 questions, it should be 20 different questions.
[taking a look at a T-shirt] How does that work for you, man? You having fun being George Edward Lopez?
I didn't say my middle name.
No, you didn't, did you?
[George II stands up, concerned]
Look, buddy, I got a button right here behind the counter.
Hey, press it. I want the cops to come. Because *I'm* the real George Lopez.
Dude, what are you talking about?
You went on the internet, got my information and stole my identity. You ruined my credit. What the hell is your real name?
[George II gets his wallet out]
[shows his license] It's George Lopez.
Anybody could get a fake license. Quick, what's your social security number?
Psst. [grabs a skateboard and walks out from behind the counter] I'm not giving out my social security number.
Why not?
Somebody might steal my identity.
[puts it with the others]
Alright, I'll tell you mine. We'll say it at the same time. Ready? Go.
849-220-6460.
[George turns away, then back, looking serious. George II glares]
Oh, no, you're good.
Look, I don't know how this is happening. I got some credit problems, but... I'm not a thief, man.
Okay, here's what you're gonna do. Be at my work tomorrow at 9:00 AM. I wanna see your birth certificate, or I'm calling the cops. And if the cops don't find you, I will, and I'll kick your ass.
Kick all you want, dude. I skateboard. I can't feel anything down there. [George glares at him] I'll be there.
[George walks out]
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