Stewie and Phone in “I Never Met the Dead Man”

Stewie

[playing with his Sesame Street phone] Put me through to the Pentagon!

Do you know what sound a cow makes?

Stewie

Don't toy with me, Ernie! I've already dispatched with Mr. Hooper, I've got six armed men stationed outside Big Bird's nest, and as for Linda... well it's rather difficult for a deaf woman to hear an assassin approach, now, isn't it?

Can you count to three?

Stewie

Ho-ho, indeed I can! [pulls out a laser gun and shoots the phone with each number] ONE! TWO! THREE! Can I count to three? For God's sake, I'm already shooting at a fifth-grade level.