So I said, "This is Val talking, not just some ordinary teen loser from Loserville."
Mmm.
Anyway, I am through with famous guys. I'm sticking with fashion designers and studio heads, at least for the time being.
Mmm.
Waterproof eye makeup is so important, Dar. And glitter -- I'm really into glitter these days. It makes everyone feel like a star. Are you getting this, Dar? Why don't you read me back your notes?
Okay. "What am I doing here? How am I going to get through this? Dear God, help me."
Wow, you are so existential. But didn't you write down anything I said? [phone rings] Hang on. [into phone] You got Val, go. How can I not appeal to their demographic? They are so wack -- I am their demographic. They wouldn't know edgy if it bit them in the butt. Oh, confirm my hair color appointment and facial for tomorrow, would you? And work up a schedule for my girlfriend Dar's visit. Thanks for saving my life, helpmate. [hangs up] I'm zonked. Collaborating is hard, don't you think?
How would I know?
Sorry about all those phone calls.
Oh, I just think of it as being a witness to history. Anyway, it isn't everyday your boyfriend dumps you for a starlet.
I was NOT dumped! And I am much more famous than that pathetic, B-list, pseudo celebrity! Not that the suits who control the airwaves would know. Sometimes I feel like the whole adult world is against youth culture.
Except the adults making a nice fat living off of it.
What do you mean?
What do YOU mean? What do you mean, pushing yourself as some kind of role-model when all you care about is how you look and what celebrities you know? Aren't teenage girls screwed up enough without you foisting your shallow values on them and making their lousy self images even worse?
Now look here, missy. I mean, what are you, Dar, a teacher? I am a role model! I'm in touch with the teen within.
Why don't you get in touch with the 30-something without? Your readers aren't going to be teenagers forever, unlike you. A real role model would be teaching them stuff they can use.
30-something?! You know, I came here to do an article on a smart girl who's cool, because smart is cool. But cool is cool, too, and smart that doesn't get cool isn't so smart, is it? You can forget about New York, Daria. You know, deep down you're nothing but a... a...
A brain?
You almost made me say it! [leaves, then sticks head back in] I don't really look like I'm 30-something, do I?
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