We MUST think of ways to make money.
I know an easy way.
Oh?
Print it.
Criminal Minds · Season 1, Episode 15
“Unfinished Business” · Season 1, Episode 15
In this episode: Dean Winchester (940), Damon Salvatore (715), Sam Winchester (665), Olivia Benson (637), Stephen Fry (608), Narrator (554), Clark Kent (523), Nate (486)
We MUST think of ways to make money.
I know an easy way.
Oh?
Print it.
I'll kill myself.
Good thinking. Blooker, if you DO get that stock for me, I'll buy you the biggest, thickest, juiciest camel hump steak in town. Whadda ya have to say to that?
I'll kill myself.
Got a one-track mind, Blooker - I like that!
Well, what's for supper? I could eat a horse!
Come come, Fester, you had that for lunch.
Uncle Fester, be patient, we'll be dining soon. Why don't you go over and chat with Lurch and Cousin Itt?
Oh, they're always talking politics!
Darling, are those men staring at us?
Not us. At you. You're ravishing!
[Starts kissing her arm]
Darling, please. It's early.
Your watch is slow.
Hey, they're coming over. They got such funny looks in their eyes, they COULD be people from Mars.
Nonsense. They're not little, they're not green, and they don't have things sticking out of their heads.
Uts sfoo dedidivuh PAH!
Itt's right. They could be disguised.
Well, whoever they are, we must be neighborly. We don't want them thinking we Earth-people are snobs.
[told the chimpanzee is her son] No, I absolutely refuse to believe that THAT... Gomez? Look. He has that same lovely low brow as... you-know-who.
Yeah, and that same fine prehistoric jawline.
Oo, oo, oo, oo.
Oh, it IS Pugsley. I know that voice anywhere.
[Thing engages the others in a game of charades to try telling them where he's found Pugsley]
I think he's trying to tell us something.
What is it, Thing? Something we should know?
Is it smaller than a coffin?
Larger than a tsetse fly?
Is it the title of a song?
Oh, this is fun. I mean, it WOULD be if Pugsley were here. Is it someone we know?
How many syllables?
Two syllables. Ah, ha... Whom do we know with two syllables? First syllable. Sounds like.
[Thing slugs the air]
Fight?
Fighting.
Fight-ER!
Pugilist.
Pug! Pug... Pug... Ahhh... It just doesn't seem to ring a bell.
Oh, not my suit of armor please, I need it to feel secure. Like Pugsley needs his wolf-head clock. That armor's the... only place I can find to hide in, to take my afternoon's nap.
Uncle Fester, the whole family has given until it hurts.
Well, I like to hurt as much as anybody, but don't ask me to give my armor up. I have to wear it practically every day to scare off those neighborhood kids.
They annoy you?
Oh not me, but... they keep waving sticks and throwing stones at my new pet falcon. And he's getting a nervous stomach.
[holding up her headless doll] I'm donating Mary Queen of Scots.
Darling, that IS your most precious possession.
I can chop a head off another doll.
I know, but all the heads don't come off as nicely as this one. Are you sure you want to donate Mary?
Yes, but I'll never be able to look her head in the eye again.
Gomez, did you hear an explosion a moment ago?
Oh, that. Probably Uncle Fester down in the basement testing for gas leaks with a lighted match.
[the Addams family prepares to ride along with the mansion on its move to a new location]
Where are the children, dear?
Oh, they're fine. They're riding on the roof.
I do hope they don't get car sick. Is Lurch with them?
Oh, no. He likes to ride with his head out the window and growl at the passing cars.
Kitty-Cat doesn't need a hairpiece. Never met a lion who did.
A lion? In THIS house?
How else are the children going to learn anything about nature?
I can't wait till pet day at school.
Darling, I'm worried.
About what?
Uncle Fester and Madeline. I think those two are in love.
With whom?
With each other.
Impossible.
No, it's not at all impossible, darling. According to their horoscopes, it's perfect - she's a Capricorn and he's a bachelor.
Cousin Itt? From, eh, who's side of the family?
He's from both sides of the family. He hasn't quite found himself.
And with Cousin Itt, that's not easy. He looks the same from every angle.
Poor Cousin Itt, he's so nervous he went up in the treehouse with Uncle Fester.
I hope a passing eagle doesn't snatch him up.
Oh dear, he would make good nesting material, wouldn't he?
Lurch! He's been stabbed!
Nonsense, darling. That's the way he sings.
He'd be better stabbed.
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