Criminal Minds · Season 1, Episode 15
“Unfinished Business” · Season 1, Episode 15
In this episode: Dean Winchester (940), Damon Salvatore (715), Sam Winchester (665), Olivia Benson (637), Stephen Fry (608), Narrator (554), Clark Kent (523), Nate (486)
Jade, where is the mask?
[Groans] At last!
Uh... Found it.
And now, Chans. Prepare to make the fiercest tribe of ShadowKhan yet, mine! Demon summons ninja army!
[Jackie and Jade gasp with horror, but it is revealed his ShadowKhan are only a few centimeters tall]
They're...they are...they are so...
Cute!
Demon compensates for inferior ninja army!
[Hak Foo sends Jackie by throwing him to the alligators by chomping him up]
No!
WaAh!
Jackie, grab on! [The alligators gobble him up in the bottom of the water]
Jackie!
I will not see you later, alligator.
[A tiny Shadowkhan lands on his shoulder] Huh? [He looks up as more and more appear on the ledge and start jumping down on him until he is up to his waist in tiny Shadowkhan]
Whoa! Ninja swarm! Don't worry, Jackie! No shadow, no lunch!
[struggling as the tiny Shadowkhan horde grabs him and throws him into the light of a streetlamp—directly after the horde aggressively runs toward him, now that his shadow is vulnerable] Uh oh...! [desperately tries to turn on his vacuum—unsuccessfully]
[Jade suddenly appears, chi-geared-up with her working vacuum, and suctions the mini Shadowkhan away]
You've been hosed!
[The Shadowkhan are sucked up; Jackie exhales in relief]
[genuine, sincere tone] Thank you, Jade.
[Jade reacts with a bashful reaction to the praise: lets out a girlish giggle, shifts into a coy posture/turns her body slightly, flashes a wide grin, blinks twice in quick succession as the scene transitions away to Uncle doing research]
SCREAMING EAGLE FEET! [kicks at Jackie, only to end up piercing the bottom of his foot on the horn of a skull stuck on Jackie's head] AAH! Crying puppy feet! Crying puppy feet!
Uncle sends you to find Oni mask and you return with gibberish?
Hello! It's not gibberish; it's a site on the Web.
Ooh, the mask has been taken by giant spider?
[watching Jade use her laptop] Jade, why did you not tell Uncle your waffle iron was magic?
You're FilthyRich1?
But you're not rich, just-
I am fully aware of the irony!
The mask is evil, Jade. It is only a matter of time before it turns you evil too.
[wearing half of an Oni mask] Tch, I can handle it. One, it's only half the evil of a regular mask. And two... [demonic voice] the next time you call me crazy, I SHALL DEVOUR YOUR BRAINS! [regular voice] ...Hehe, see your point.
We have to find the delivery truck.
No problem, Jackie. I'll just order my half-a-khan to chase it down and [demonic voice] feast upon the delicious gray matter of the helpless mortal inside!
Jade, the evil within you is growing stronger. You must resist it until we can find the potion.
Well, we better find it fast, 'cause your brains are starting to smell awful yummy.
[cell phone rings] Hello? [hands it to Jade] It's for you.
Jade, we were in the middle of a big auction and then all the icons disappeared.
No problem, T. Just click on the blinking Super-Moose in the corner and [demonic voice] SURRENDER YOUR SOUL TO THE FORCES OF DARKNESS!
Uh... I will figure it out on my own.
Jade?
Hey, Jackie.
[Gasps]
No way are we handing over our life savings to someone who looks like a pizza boy.
Yo yo yo. This is one pizza boy who's going to serve up an extra large whupping with extra cheese!
Easy does it, Jackie.
WaAh! Jade, why do you have to show up every time?!
Cause' you miss me if I didn't.
Let's finish him off! [Ratso and Chow stops her]
Now, Jade.
You know your Uncle Jackie will not approve.
Aw...
These quotes come from Wikiquote's Criminal Minds pages and are available under the Creative Commons Attribution-ShareAlike License.
