[about her essay] How did you know it was mine?
Well, Adam thought "As You Like It" was a song by Jay-Z. And only you could turn the topic of dreams into existential angst.
“Unfinished Business” · Season 1, Episode 15
In this episode: Dean Winchester (940), Damon Salvatore (715), Sam Winchester (665), Olivia Benson (637), Stephen Fry (608), Narrator (554), Clark Kent (523), Nate (486)
Steve says his "thing" is girls properly enjoying sex. He says he can tell I'm being fake.
Well, are you?
Yeah. I'm always fake.
What I'm saying is, before you talk to Steve, you... you should probably figure out, you know, what works for you... and your body.
So you're prescribing a wank?
...Yeah.
We've been holding hands for 45 minutes. I know how to hold hands. I'm here to fornicate.
I've been wanking all night. I ate four packets of crumpets, and I think my clit might drop off.
Intercourse can be wonderful, but it can also cause tremendous pain. And if you're not careful, sex can destroy lives.
LLiam
I'm gonna jump!
Stop, Liam, don't. Don't do this.
LLiam
Oh. Hi Otis.
You don't wanna jump.
LLiam
No. I think I do.
You don't. Look... sometimes, the people we like don't like us back, and it's painful, but there's nothing we can do about it.
LLiam
You don't understand.
I do. I do understand. I know what it's like when someone doesn't feel the same way about you. It's... someone you can't stop thinking about. It hurts. But you can't make people like you.
LLiam
I don't like her - I love her!
I know. But love isn't about grand gestures, or the moon and the stars. It's just dumb luck. And sometimes, you meet someone who feels the same way. And then sometimes you're unlucky. But one day, you're gonna meet someone who appreciates you for who you are. I mean, there's seven billion people on the planet. I know one of them is gonna climb up on a moon for you.
LLiam
Really?
Yeah, you're brillian! You're very dedicated. You're gonna make someone really happy one day.
LLizzie
But it will not be me!
Not Lizzie, definitely not Lizzie, but someone. And it won't happen if you fall off that moon and die.
LLiam
Okay.
You're not in any trouble. I sorted it.
Okay, what... what happened? Are we... are we not gonna talk about this? Is that it?
I trusted you, Otis.
My vagina has betrayed me.
How, exactly?
I finally find someone who's DTF, and he can't get his average-sized dick in my stupid vagina. Why is this happening to me? It just doesn't make any sense. I've worked so hard. The set, the costumes, the makeup. Everything was perfect. I couldn't even get my finger in there. It's like my vag has lockjaw. What do I do?
Well, you used the word "perfect." Maybe it's a way of staying in control. In... in your fantasy, you're in charge. And reality can be... just, quite different.
Nah, I just like aliens.
Do you like being out of control?
I guess not. Like, I hate roller coasters.
Me, too. I do not like simulated danger.
I guess I am kind of type A.
Well, maybe... you're unconsciously halting your progress to stay in control.
But I want to have sex, so why would I do that?
I don't know.
RRahim
As if you were on fire from within, the moon lives in the lining of your skin.
EEEric Effiong
Pardon?
RRahim
It's about finding beauty in the world.
EEEric Effiong
Ohhh.
RRahim
It's a poem - by Pablo Neruda.
EEEric Effiong
Ohh. I don't know her.
Cum is kind of like a penis having a sneeze.
Dreams aren't real. That's why they're called dreams.
This is it. It's your chance to do something positive. Give something back. You can help people, you can really make a difference to people's lives. That's what community service is all about. There are people out there who think you're scum. You have an opportunity to show them they're wrong.
Yeah, but what if they're right? [Looks at Gary] No offence. [Pointing at Gary] But I'm thinking some people are just born criminals.
GGary
You're looking to get stabbed?
You see my point there?
What? I thought you had finished!
You see my lips still moving, this means I'm still talking!
Yeah, but you could have been yawning or... chewing.
Ehm, what makes you think you’re better than us?
What is that accent?!
Is that for real?
What are you trying to say something, yeah?
It’s a- are you- that’s just a noise! Are we supposed to be able to understand her?!
[licks him off] Do you understand that?
These quotes come from Wikiquote's Criminal Minds pages and are available under the Creative Commons Attribution-ShareAlike License.