It's made me want to find a hole in the world, in the shape of me and just fill it up.
“Unfinished Business” · Season 1, Episode 15
In this episode: Dean Winchester (940), Damon Salvatore (715), Sam Winchester (665), Olivia Benson (637), Stephen Fry (608), Narrator (554), Clark Kent (523), Nate (486)
Hannah (to Adam): I know that this is complicated, but I also know that we can work it out.
Well, I'm sick of trying to work it out. Can't one thing ever be easy with you?
If you're here to tell me what a bad person I am, I don't wanna hear it. Seriously I know and no, I have not told Shoshanna yet but I will and I fucking know I have to do it. And I know that I need to have more respect for the emotional property of other women and I know that I use sex for validation because it's what I do.
DDesi
What are you staring at me about?
What do you mean?
DDesi
You're staring at me.
I'm staring at you? You're playing aggressive guitar at me.
DDesi
There's nothing aggressive about that. It's a ballad.
Okay.
DDesi
I think it's weird you haven't said anything since noon.
Well, we're in a fight, so I don't want to talk to you.
DDesi
Well...
That's kind of the definition of fighting.
DDesi
That's kind of the definition of cold.
No, I'm not cold, I'm mad.
DDesi
Yeah. So you can't even let me know that you're... that you're here with me? You can't even connect?
No, I don't... I don't want to connect. I want space. Well, I don't want space. I love you. See, Desi, that's a major part of the problem. That you don't seem to care at all about what I want.
DDesi
Oh, I don't care what you want?
Yeah, you don't care.
DDesi
Would you prefer that I just pretend nothing's wrong with me? And stop feeling all of my feelings and... and hug you and fuck you and tell you how amazing you are and how much I love you?
That sounds really positive to me.
DDesi
I think that'd make you happy, too.
Oh, Jesus.
DDesi
No.
Whoa.
DDesi
You know you just recoiled from my touch?
I didn't.
DDesi
You recoiled from my touch like I'm a monster.
Oh, my God. You know something? In all the months that we courted, I never dreamed that you could be this cruel.
DDesi
Cruel?
Yeah.
DDesi
Oh, are you fucking serious? Cruel? I don't want to go get a scone with you this morning and now I'm cruel? Oh, boy. You're... you've got to be kidding me. I want to fucking die.
No, you don't. You don't want to die.
DDesi
Yes I do, I wanna fucking kill myself. You don't want to kill yourself, either. You are far too narcissistic to kill yourself.
DDesi
Open your heart to me. Bella, open your heart to me now! Stop.
It's fucking open!
DDesi
Bella!
CCharlie
Marnie.
Yeah?
CCharlie
Try these on. Try those on.
Oh, my God, I can't try all these on.
CCharlie
Yes, you can. I'm just giving you options, baby, you know what I mean? I'm just giving you options. I'm just giving you more and more options. Okay. Hey. Hey, do you, ah, do you have a bathroom I can use? I'm gonna buy stuff. I just need to use the bathroom.
SCStore clerk
Oh, yeah, there's a burrito place next door. You just have to, like, buy a soda or something.
Oh, okay.
CCharlie
Uh, Marnie, I'll be right back!
SCStore clerk
Okay. That dress looks really pretty on you.
Oh, thank you so much. I feel like a Bob Mackie Barbie doll.
SCStore clerk
Oh, no, that's 100% the look. That's what people come in here wanting.
That guy's my ex-boyfriend. I haven't seen him in literally almost two years until just now. Or like, just before right now. He left without any explanation, and now I'm married to, like, an entirely different man who's also my musical partner.
SCStore clerk
Cool.
I know you might be wondering, like, how does someone fit that much action into such a short amount of time. Yes, I am only 25 and a half years old.
CCharlie
That's no, that seems right. But somehow I've managed to live so much. I feel like I'm looking out the eyes of a woman at hands that have touched and have been touched. Does that make any sense? Whoa, oh. Hey, oh, my God. You look great.
Yeah? Are you sure? I don't know.
CCharlie
That's perfect, yeah. No, you look awesome. All right, let's do this. Yeah? How much is it?
What? I need heels and stuff like that.
CCharlie
Doesn't matter. No, no, no, you're good. They're waiting on us!
What are you doing? What are we doing here?
CCharlie
I just have a friend who asked me to swing by.
What kind of friend? Everyone here is 150 years old.
CCharlie
Just wait here a second, okay?
No way.
CCharlie
Just wait one second.
No fucking way. I'm not standing here alone in this dress.
CCharlie
All right. Suit yourself, come on. Brian, hello.
BBrian
Hello, sir.
CCharlie
Brian, this is my fiancée, Masha.
BBrian
Masha, it's a pleasure.
CCharlie
Uh, will you ladies excuse us for just a moment?
MMasha
Of course, Brian. He buying cocaine for us to have party.
BBrian
Yeah, I can see that. Out of curiosity, how old are you?
25 and half.
BBrian
Makes sense.
MMasha
Okay, uh, I'm just gonna use the bathroom really quick, okay?
BBrian
What's your name, darling?
I'm Magita. Magita Perez.
BBrian
Well, Magita, what would you say if I asked you to join Masha and me later upstairs? Masha? Me?
MMasha
Is Brian the person I should talk to negotiate that?
No, no, I'll handle it. I'm, uh, 300 cash, up front.
BBrian
Room 1206. We'll be there by 10:30.
Sounds good, except there's a $200 fee if I'm going above the tenth floor. I'm afraid of heights. And a hundred-dollar gown rental fee. Unless you want me to wear my jeans.
BBrian
See you in an hour.
Looking forward to it.
[Marnie and Desi finish having sex]
I'm a fucking monster!
...
So, Marnie's been fucking Desi for a full two weeks. Ray has no idea and thinks he's just in a regular in-love couple. And Marnie says that Desi cries every time they say hell or goodbye to each other, and now she and Desi are seriously considering trying anal.
He’s not getting anything up Marnie’s ass!
...
DDesi
Road trips and skinny dips!
America!
When I was in fifth grade, I had this English teacher, Mr. Lasky. He liked me. He was impressed with me. I did, like, special creative writing. I wrote, like, a little novel or whatever. Sometimes when he was talking to the class, he'd stand behind me and he'd just, like, rub my neck. Sometimes he'd, like, rub my head, rustle my hair. And I didn't mind. It made me feel special. It made me feel like someone saw me and they knew that I was gonna grow up and be really, really particular. It also made kids hate me and put lasagna in my fucking backpack, but that's a different story. Anyway, last year, I'm at this, like, whatever, warehouse party in Bushwick, and this dude comes up to me and he's like, "Horvath, "we went to middle school together, East Lansing." And I'm like, "Oh, my God, remember how crazy Mr. Lasky's class was? "He was basically trying to molest me." And you know what this kid said? He looks at me in the middle of this buckskin party like he's a judge and he goes, "That's a very serious accusation, Hannah." And he walked away. And there I am, and I'm just 11 again, and I'm just getting my buckskin neck rubbed. Because that stuff never goes away.
How did you get appointed to the bench?
You know Dan, that's a funny story. It was the mayor's last day in office and it was a Sunday and my name was at the bottom of the list of a 1,000 candidates. So they start calling folks starting at the top of the list. You see it's Sunday and no one's home. So they keep calling down the list, name by name. No one answers. Finally they get down to the bottom of the list and voila.
You mean you were appointed a judge because…
I was home.
Mr. Prosecutor, Ms. Gardener, I am prepared to listen to the testimony, cross-examine the witnesses, consider the precedents that I'm sure you've both prepared, but I don't think that's gonna be necessary.
[shouting] What do you mean it's not necessary?
I'm glad you asked. We will now take a short recess. During that time I order the defendant, Mrs. Kerr and her husband, Mr. Kerr and the attorneys involved to go to a nearby restaurant, sit down, have a cup of coffee, relax, try to work out this little thing.
Your Honor, this is highly irregular.
Thanks. Court's recessed.
...
You're crazy. I mean an attempted murder and you send the plaintiff and the defendant out for a cup of coffee. What do murders get? Brunch?
Alright my methods are informal. [Lana giggles] Hey give them a chance. They might work. Maybe just maybe, it will work. [Sheila and Dan enter with tattered clothes] Then again, maybe someday pigs will fly.
Strange day, huh? I'm sure there must be an explanation for everything.
I'm sure there must be.
Like what?
He overheard some policemen talking perhaps.
Yeah or he picked up the phone when we weren't looking, disguised his voice, took down the information, replaced the receiver without us noticing and we were none the wiser.
You will already be none the wiser.
GDr. Green
Judge Harold T. Stone?
I'm Judge Stone.
GDr. Green
Dr. Peter Stone, Windwood Psychiatric Center. The police called me, told me I might find John here.
John?
GDr. Green
John Stevens. The man in the red flannel suit.
Oh that John Stevens.
JJohn
Dr. Green, what a surprise.
GDr. Green
Hello John. I feel fortunate. We usually don't catch him this soon after Christmas.
You don't?
GDr. Green
No, every year he disappears just before Christmas. Usually manages to elude us till about the first of February.
You mean this guy's a fruitcake?
Bull.
I'm sorry. Alleged fruitcake.
So Craven prints it, now what's the worst that can happen?
Well I'd be publicly disgraced, making it impossible for me to function effectively as a judge. I'd have to step down.
Right, but you've still got your health. I'm sorry. I've never tried to cheer up anybody before.
What's next?
Next we have a rather unusual case, Your Honor.
[A man in a tuxedo and a woman in a white gown enter.]
What's the problem?
GGroom
She's a slut.
BBride
He's an animal.
Off the top of my head, marital problems?
Not quite, Your Honor. They never finished the ceremony.
Your honor, I know I haven't been here very long and sometimes I, well something I don't know what the hell you're talking about. I'd like to pass on some advice that my Uncle Lionel used to give me: Talk with your head but listen with your heart.
He sounds like a wise man.
Yeah. We have no idea why he killed himself.
These quotes come from Wikiquote's Criminal Minds pages and are available under the Creative Commons Attribution-ShareAlike License.