“Unfinished Business” quotes from Criminal Minds

Oolong

You'd think he'd at least give us a last request.

Well, I have a last request. Oolong would you please shut up!?

I want the world's-

Oolong

-most comfortable pair of ultra soft underwear!

Goku, this isn't funny!

Yamcha

I don't think he's joking.

I think I'm gonna go to Master Roshi's and train like my grandpa did. I wanna get strong!

But Goku, you're the strongest kid I know!

I know, but when I hit that castle it didn't even shake, so if someone else can come along and tear the whole thing down, I really need to go and train.

Krillin

So who are you anyway, his pupil?

Yeah, I'm Goku!

Krillin

Hmm, doesn't seem that you like fighting.

I like marsh mellows!

Krillin

What's that gotta do with anything?

Well I'm hungry, and your bald head looks like one.

Krillin

What did you say? Didn't you know that everyone who's serious about martial arts shave their head? Look at Master Roshi, he shaves!

Nope, I'm naturally bald.

Krillin

[while running to the house] Hello? Hello? Man at the door!

Huh? Where's the man?

Krillin

I'm the man, ma'am. And I need to borrow a pen. It's an emergency.

A pen?

Krillin

Yes, please.

[while proving that the stone has the kanji written by Krillin, and throws it at his head] Nice try, lame-o! But it is not my handwriting! Now get out!

Krillin

[runs out of the house] Sorry!

[to Goku] What are you doing in my bed, you pervert?!

We slept here, sir. We only got two blankets...

Lame excuses, you little hedgehog! [trying to shoot Goku with a gun]

[thinking] Why can't I drink the milk?

That's not a lap, Krillin! You forgot to touch the other side of the shore!

Krillin

Are you kidding me?!

This will be single elimination, in a full regulation sized arena. You lose if you fall outside of the ring, stay down for ten counts, or give up. But poking in the eyes or hitting in the private parts are not allowed!

What parts are private?

You know what I mean, it's the thing that makes us boys!

Krillin

Who's the stink bucket?

Yamcha

That's Bacterian, he's got Herculian strength but that comes second to his offensive odor, they say he's never taken a bath since the day he was born! His opponents can only fight with one hand because the other one has to hold their nose, he takes advantage of this to win!

Focus your mind and you won't smell him. Just focus. Krillin! You don't even have a nose!

Can I have another bowl, please? [everyone face faults]

I think you've had enough for one day.

Yeah, you're right. I probably should save room for some dessert. [everyone face faults again]

Krillin

I looked through every bathroom stall in a seven mile radius!

Yamcha

Where is he?

Have you tried the lady's room?