VWVegandon Waitress
And, we haven't invented the toaster.
“Unfinished Business” · Season 1, Episode 15
In this episode: Dean Winchester (940), Damon Salvatore (715), Sam Winchester (665), Olivia Benson (637), Stephen Fry (608), Narrator (554), Clark Kent (523), Nate (486)
Nnnooooooo!
Oh no.
We're back!
WHAT!? We worked our butts off to get you guys back to your planet!
Yeah, but there's no toast there.
You came back for toast?
YES!! [Goes to the house to get his toast.] With jelly! [Eats toast]
And now that I'm staying my earlier vimit as void. And I promise, TO DESTROY EARTH, AND YOU, JOHNNY TEST!!!
You might wanna run, Johnny.
Way ahead of you.
MMary
And with all those side effects swimming around in that monster, there's no telling what that thing will do!
[furious] There's plenty of telling what that thing will do! It will do what all your experiments do - destroy the town! Because you are all INSANE!!!
JSJohnny, Susan, and Mary
[in unison] No, we're adventurous. There's a huge difference.
PPrincipal
Johnny, here's what I'm thinking...
Please, don't give me a detention! My Dad'll send me to military school! That means uniforms! Atomic wedgies!... Awkward pauses!
PPrincipal
I like you, Johnny.
So I'm free to go?
PPrincipal
No. But I'm gonna cut you a deal. If you perform 99 good deeds to make up for your 99 bad deeds, I'll forget every one of your detentions and erase them from your permanent record.
Couldn't I just write something on the chalkboard a zillion time like 'I promise not to blabeddy, blah, blah, blah.' Huh? (smiles hopefully, but the principal shakes his head.) 99 good deeds it is!
PPrincipal
And no cheating. Remember, I'm the principal. I know everything!
[Johnny tries to help an old lady cross the road. He takes her arm.]
Hello, Ma'am. May I assist you?
OOld Lady
Oh, I get it. I'm an old lady. Well, I'm also independent, lonely, but independent. BACK OFF!
Yeah? You forgot CRAZY!
WHAT D'YOU MEAN NONE OF MY GOOD DEEDS COUNT?!!
PPrincipal
Solving a problem that you create is NOT a good deed. Returning the wallet was a good deed, but your dog swiped it. And giving someone their I.B. bag back is nice, but your dog shouldn't have taken it in the first place.
Um... how did you know it was my dog?
PPrincipal
I know everything. Plus, I have access to the city's traffic surveillance system.
Wow. I look so guilty on camera.
These quotes come from Wikiquote's Criminal Minds pages and are available under the Creative Commons Attribution-ShareAlike License.