Criminal Minds · Season 1, Episode 15
“Unfinished Business” · Season 1, Episode 15
In this episode: Dean Winchester (940), Damon Salvatore (715), Sam Winchester (665), Olivia Benson (637), Stephen Fry (608), Narrator (554), Clark Kent (523), Nate (486)
According to Netflix, last night I watched half the Takens and all the Insidiouses-es. All of them!
Relax. You probably just sleep-watched them. And you probably also sleep-ordered 28 boxes of tampons on Amazon.
Max, you hacked into my accounts? That's illegal! And beyond what I thought you were intellectually capable of!
Not much of a hack when the password is "Hanstoppable."
That's a breach of trust, girls. Did you order me those shoes?
Dammit! I should have gone with "Han Golden Pond."
And is this your same-sex partner?
I will be if that gets me in the will.
Bernard, this is Max. She's my roommate.
Yes, that's what we called them back in the day.
I'm Periscoping.
Isn't periscoping when you do mouth stuff on a guy while he keeps a lookout for the cops?
Not all sex has to involve the threat of an arrest, Max. Periscope is a social media app that streams live videos to your followers. Tell everyone in Brooklyn who loves food festivals that we'll be at the Taste of Bushwick tomorrow.
Or you can follow me into the bathroom while I change, and they can see some bushwick right now.
[Max and Caroline have VIP tickets for Oleg's cousin's basketball game]
Where are the fliers? I bet we could get a lot of business there.
No! We are not doing business! Tonight is supposed to be fun.
Well, I find business fun, but okay. One day, you will appreciate my ambition.
And one day, I will try lettuce, but not tonight. No fliers.
No fliers.
No fliers.
I just think this is a missed opportunity.
"Missed Opportunity" was my stripper name at the Salty Dog. Look, I don't wanna work tonight. Which also happened to be my catchphrase.
I'd love to stay and talk, but I just remembered I have to run away.
[on being told by Bobby that he has no right to drill at Southfork] I'm a Ewing. I have every right.
[on catching an intruder in the house] I don't miss, mister, not at any range.
[in the nursing home, to John Ross] Bobby was always a fool. Stubborn as a mule.
Son, the courts are for amateurs and the faint of heart. No, this is personal.
Blood may be thicker than water, but oil is thicker than both.
We're in the oil business, boys!
[to John Ross] Think of me as an ally. I can help.
I'm the one who belongs on Southfork. It's mine! And only mine.
Oil's the past, John Ross. Alternatives are the future.
I couldn't disagree more.
Oh, Bobby's not your dad. Everbody knows your dad sold you when you were a little baby. You'll never be a Ewing, Christopher! [Christopher starts beating up on John Ross]
These quotes come from Wikiquote's Criminal Minds pages and are available under the Creative Commons Attribution-ShareAlike License.
