Quick! Mirror Harper! Do something! I don't want to go back!
(throws something at the mirror and breaks it)
“Unfinished Business” · Season 1, Episode 15
In this episode: Dean Winchester (940), Damon Salvatore (715), Sam Winchester (665), Olivia Benson (637), Stephen Fry (608), Narrator (554), Clark Kent (523), Nate (486)
MTMirror Theresa
Everything just works out fine when everyone agrees with you!
(turns the lights off then turns them on again)
TJTheresa and Justin
(holding the last piece)
You Russos are so predictable.
(asks the the magic chicken) Which one of us will win the wizard competition?
What's going on?
There's gifts from Uncle Kelbo that we weren't suppose to open but we did. Mom hates magic. There's a magic chicken running around. If you see waffles don't ask where they came from. Just enjoy them.
Wait, people are eating waffles? I made cake.
(to Alex) Why is there a chicken on the terrace?
Uh well off the record, the chicken is gonna lay an egg that's gonna tell us who's gonna win the wizard competition. Now on the record, I don't- what chicken?
Woah. Did the magic chicken move all the furniture around?
EUncle Ernesto
What?
Uh, Max calls Dad Magic Chicken.
Right. And I call him (pointedly) Boy Who Should Stop Talking.
Hey, magic chicken!
EUncle Ernesto
Jerry, your son's calling you.
What? Oh, uh, right, uh, we do love our nicknames in this family, (to Alex) don't we, What Should We Do Now?
Yep, yep that's my nickname!
My nickname is, I'm Sorry Mom and Remember I'm the Good One Usually the Victim.
EUncle Ernesto
Kinda long isn't it?
Yeah well now we're never gonna find out who wins the wizard competition.
How about right after we actually have the wizard competition?
I trust the chicken more.
Thank you for making the cake Harper, it's beautiful, and it looks delicious.
Oh, no, ohhh, we don't eat it. The Finkle tradition is that you make a cake from scratch and the you use rolling pins to smash it together as a family. It's the one time of year we let out our frustrations.
(as Juliet) Okay let's stare at the tree and I'll explain more.
Are you really going to make Max that stupid backpack shirt?
No! A backpack shirt would be embarrassing.
And that hat?
Oh don't start with me! Look I just wanted to get you into the lair. I can't stand to see Justin like this.
Well I can't stand to see Justin hardly at all, but I've gotten used to it and so should you because Juliet is not coming back.
Or is she?
No, she's not! Didn't you see her hobble off into the woods? I think Mason ate her.
Alright here's a thought. Justin needs to move on and if he can't hear it from us, maybe he needs to hear it from Juliet.
But he already did hear it from her. The old lady version of her.
Yeah but come on, who listens to old people? What if you made me look like Juliet and she told him?
Harper that doesn't sound like you want to help Justin, it sounds like you want to date him.
Oh that's not it. Why is it so hard to get you Russos to do something nice for each other?
Because when you help someone your guard is down and that's when another Russo will come right behind you and trip you!
(gives Alex a look)
Okay! Fine! I'll do it! But only because you're doing all the work. I'm just waving a wand. (waves her wand) Transfix, transpose. Make Harper look like Juliet from head to toe. (casts the spell and has a shocked look on her face)
(transforms into old Juliet) Eh? How do I look?
(lying) Great! You look great! (serious) Umm...this is a lot more work than I thought. Okay alright. (waves her wand) Transfix, transpose. Make Harper look like young Juliet including the clothes.
(transforms to young Juliet)
There you go. (throws her wand to the sofa)
Testing, testing. Ooh! I even have Juliet's voice! I pale in comparison to Harper Finkle. I've always wanted to hear her say that!
Okay now go walk around Waverly Place until you bump into Justin.
And I'll tell him to just move on from Juliet. We'll have a moment but that will be it. Oh, what should we do about the backpack shirt for Max?
I'll-I'll throw something together.
Just make sure it's not shoddy workmanship. It's Harper who's making that.
Don't push it blondie.
(leaves)
(voice over) When Alex turned me into Juliet I had good intentions. But then you started asking those questions and I panicked.
(hiding)
(to Max) Max, did you see Juliet go by?
(comes out from hiding)
Psst!
(goes to Alex)
What are you doing?! You're supposed to be with Justin.
I panicked.
(to Harper) That wasn't for Juliet. It was for you Harper. Thank you.
No problem.
(pulls out his wand) Transfix, transpose. Make Harper look like herself again including the clothes.
(transforms back to herself again) Thank you. And when you kissed me I was Juliet so Zeke doesn't have to know about this.
(to Max) So, how'd it go?
Pretty good. I ate squirrel, made some new enemies...it was a regular day.
(to Justin) So, how'd it go? (Justin ignores her) (to Alex) How'd it go? Was it Mason?
Yes. It was him. But he's being held by some country wizards who grow corn by their beds and have a son with one shoe!
Oh, good, I thought you were going to say something crazy!
I can't believe it. My true love is a wolf again! And the fact that I have to use "again" at the end of that sentence just shows how messed up our lives really are.
These quotes come from Wikiquote's Criminal Minds pages and are available under the Creative Commons Attribution-ShareAlike License.