Alberto, was it? Alberto, I'm not one to niggle over management styles, but let's say you would have let me know you were coming, I would have preserved some proof for you. A head, say, or a set of teeth?
“Unfinished Business” · Season 1, Episode 15
In this episode: Dean Winchester (940), Damon Salvatore (715), Sam Winchester (665), Olivia Benson (637), Stephen Fry (608), Narrator (554), Clark Kent (523), Nate (486)
My suite is being cleaned. The microwave exploded.
Someone put metal in the science oven?
I finally saw that.
What did you think?
Needs more Jason Statham.
I give you a gift, the anus is on you to take care of it, not just give it away to any old dick face happens along.
This it then, Raylan? No final words, put Dewey Crowe in his place?
My advice? Stop talking about yourself in the third person. Makes you sound like a fool.
Third person? This guy? [indicating the driver] Man, I don't understand you.
You said you'd help us get him. You didn't get him. So we'll be proceeding to convene a grand jury, bring charges against you as soon as possible.
Are you back to that file bullshit?
Bullshit?
[Raylan opens his desk and pulls out a thick file of papers.]
There it is. Thick with the names of the suffering and the dead, and many felled by your own hands. A trail of human wreckage you've left rotting in jail cells and cold graves throughout this state. And why? Because they had the poor judgment to believe your lies and follow your tune. Well, it's high time that tune reached a shuddering crescendo.
Say, what's the first thing you ever killed? You're from Florida, right?
KCKendal Crowe
Gator, maybe. When I was 11.
I was 11, too, or thereabouts. Wasn't a gator, though. Will Hendricks' pig got out of its pen, went feral, started tearing up my mama's vegetable patch. Arlo built the trap, caught it, gave me a gun, said, "get 'er done." You ever see a pig that's gone feral? Nasty. Tusks grow. They get dirty, ill-tempered. They don't look bad from a distance, but get up close, best watch your ass. You hook the gator before you...?
KCKendal Crowe
Danny hooked him. Wanted to do it himself, but Daryl said it was my time.
Well, there you are, pointing that gun at something that's staring back at you, right? Longer I stood there, the less I wanted to do it. Not that I had a choice. Arlo'd tan my hide if I didn't.
KCKendal Crowe
Danny called me a pussy.
Ain't about being a pussy, though, is it? No small thing, taking a life. Hell, my hand was shaking so bad, first shot nearly missed. Pig squealing, bucking, spraying blood. Put three more shots just to get it to lay still. I knew I should have felt good about it, but I didn't. Walked home, stepped through the front door, and threw up. That's when Arlo called me a pussy. He beat the shit out of me, too. Started thinking less about what I'd done to that pig and more—about what I'd like to do to Arlo.
KCKendal Crowe
Well, did you do it?
Not as such. I always wondered, though, if I didn't join the Marshals just to prove something to him what a badass I was. Maybe just to spite him. He hated me being a lawman. And I knew. I knew when I joined that I might have to shoot someone in the line of duty. But first time it happened, god damn if it wasn't the same feeling sick to my stomach. Just kept asking myself if there was something I could have done different short of pulling my gun. What was it like for you?
KCKendal Crowe
What, the gator? It's a goddamn dinosaur. Who gives a shit?
Now, some folks say Disneyland is the happiest place on Earth. Well, I promise those folks ain't never partied with Boyd Crowder in Sin City.
ARAlberto Ruiz
You have good hunting around here?
Not bad. My daddy used to take me and my brother when we was young, but I didn't much care for it. Prefer to hunt animals who have a chance to fight back.
ARAlberto Ruiz
My father took me as well, to the Sonoran desert.
Ah. Hunting big game, like scorpions, and lizards and whatnot?
ARAlberto Ruiz
Mostly bighorn sheep and mule deer. We'd spend the morning making our kills, take them back to our campsite, where my father taught me how to skin them. The first cut, you make right down the belly. Bleed the animal, remove the insides, careful not to puncture the bladder. Next, you remove the genitals. Now you are ready to the take the skin. Cut first at the ankle joints, snap the tendons, start to peel back the pelt. The trick is to remove it in one piece. It's easiest when the animal is still warm.
You want me shit my pants, Alberto? 'Cause it seems to me, that'd make your job a hell of a lot more unpleasant. You see, I know real pain. Shit you can't even imagine. Now, you want to put me out of my misery? How 'bout you stop running your goddamn mouth and do whatever it is you got to do.
You a dirty, rotten, nasty bitch.
WCWendy Crowe
Well, I guess we all get the family we deserve, right, Daryl?
You know good and well I ain't gonna let you walk up out of here with that, right?
WCWendy Crowe
What are you gonna do, kill me?
Mm. Give me that phone, Wendy, or I'm gonna take it, and stick it down your goddamn throat.
WCWendy Crowe
Well, that'd be a real ballsy move, wouldn't it, Daryl? [presses a gun to Daryl's crotch] How are you gonna do it without your balls?
[standing over a dying Daryl] Didn't I tell you you were gonna wish I killed you? Well, don't you?
I'm so hungry, I could eat the ass out of a low-flying duck.
Good things happen to those who wait for stupid.
I believe that was in the Sermon on the Mount.
[about Dewey Crowe] You know, he once told me he worked at Disney World dressed as Goofy, in a water-skiing show.
Well, some guys just peak too early.
Yeah, you could kill Boyd. Then you'd be headed down to Florida without a star and a gun. And you might be seeing your daughter through the glass on visitation days at the penitentiary. Or, Raylan, there's another way it goes, where you try and you fail and the bullet finds you.
Unlikely.
I know you think so, but if you'll allow me... You get to be my age, do the job as long as you do... sometimes it just doesn't go your way.
I want to go back. I want it to be like it used to be at the church, when we was Crowder's commandos!
You, me, and Devil.
Yes! And the Pork brothers, giving me no end of shit. The music cranked so loud that we almost blew the roof off that old church. Bombing around in my Cadillac and making war plans and drinking 'shine. Why can't it be like that again, Boyd?
These quotes come from Wikiquote's Criminal Minds pages and are available under the Creative Commons Attribution-ShareAlike License.