You know what happened to the real Trigger, don't you? Roy Rogers had him stuffed.
“Unfinished Business” · Season 1, Episode 15
In this episode: Dean Winchester (940), Damon Salvatore (715), Sam Winchester (665), Olivia Benson (637), Stephen Fry (608), Narrator (554), Clark Kent (523), Nate (486)
(to Rodney) Your dad always said that one day Del Boy would reach the top. There again, he always used to say that one day Millwall would win the cup!
I saw myself more in the capacity of a financial advisor.
A financial advisor?! Bonjour Trieste! You are beautiful, you are, Rodney! Today, I almost clinched a deal to buy these briefcases for £175. When my "financial advisor" stuck his nose in, and advised me to pay £200. Right? And now, having paid the £200, my "financial advisor" now advises me to chuck the bleedin' lot in the river! Now, with financial advisors like that, who needs a bleedin' recession?
Do you hear that?
No, what is it?
That's Mum turning in her grave.
You wouldn't remember when I married your grandmother.
(sarcastically) No.
It's been so long that Rodney had a bit on the side, he didn't know they'd moved it.
I'm gonna do what Monica was doing last night!
Going dancing with Mickey Pearce?
[Del wonders why Rodney took him to a peculiar club.]
It looked all right from the outside.
It looked all right from the outside? That's what the Christians said about the Colosseum!
(hurriedly, after talking to a couple of "women") Drink up, we're leaving.
Why? Are they a couple of ravers?
No, they're a couple of geezers!"
MMichelle
(asking Rodney which tennis turf he likes playing on) What do you prefer? Astroturf or grass?
I don't know, I've never smoked astroturf!
(telling Del what he has just accidentally done in the car on their way home) Del, you know that cigar packet you just gave me... I chucked out the window about a mile and a half back.
You what? You pranny!!!!
[After Del brakes suddenly, another car a Cortina, smashes into the Jaguar he and Rodney are sitting in. The Cortina is driven by the Australian man.]
God! I don't believe it. I just do not believe it! Now look what you've done Rodney, you've smashed up Boycie's E-Type Jaguar.
Me? You were driving it.
Don't play bloody word games with me, Rodney! (shouting at the car behind) What's your game pal. What is your game, are you blind or something?
AMAustralian Man
I'm very sorry about that mate, but the brakes on this thing are a bit dicky... You! I've been looking for you two flaming Gollahs all day long... Now come here!
What do you mean "won't see us arrive" I want people to see me arrive
In a three wheeled van? Still got no choice have we?
Yes we have. We can take Boycie's E type Jaguar
Are you all right, Del? I thought you was in bother!
That's why it took you an hour and a half to come! Didn't Grandad tell you that I'd called?
Oh yeah, he told me! "Del Boy's been captured by the Indians!" he said. I didn't know whether to call the police or the Texas Rangers!
RMr. Rahn
(to Del and Rodney) Vimmal Malik has in his possession the one single item that remains of my birthright. It's a simple porcelain statuette of Kuvera. You know who Kuvera is?
DRDel & Rodney
Yeah.
You don't know who Kuvera is!
Well he was, er, I don't know.
See what I mean Mr. Rahn, he's got 2 O-Levels and he thinks he's Bamber Gascoigne's vest.
Alright mastermind, who is he?
Kuvera was one of India's Premier Wicket Keepers.
You berk!
RMr. Rahn
Kuvera is the Hindu God of Wealth.
VVimmal
Where's your watch Derek?
It's at the menders, I broke it last night playing you know volleyball.
VVimmal
I thought you were right-handed.
No, I'm ambiguous.
These quotes come from Wikiquote's Criminal Minds pages and are available under the Creative Commons Attribution-ShareAlike License.