When I was a little kid, my parents told me never to eat sweets.
So as an adult you overcompensate?
Yeah.
I'm guessing your parents also said you should never get married.
“Unfinished Business” · Season 1, Episode 15
In this episode: Dean Winchester (940), Damon Salvatore (715), Sam Winchester (665), Olivia Benson (637), Stephen Fry (608), Narrator (554), Clark Kent (523), Nate (486)
AAdvocate
Not all sex offenders are repeat offenders.
You show me a first time offender, I'll show you a guy who's never been caught before.
I've been on this beat for eight months.
Right.
And at first I was fine with it, but sometimes, I just, um, I just can't...
Instead of seeing a woman, you see a uterus, cervix...
Yeah.
It's a clinical phase. It lasts a while.
So what's the next phase?
You don't want to know.
[Munch gestures to Cassidy.]
We've only been partners a few months but the man is starting to think like me. Only slower.
Yeah, go ahead. Rain on my parade.
I don't just want to rain on your parade. I want to blow up all the floats.
[Munch wiggles his finger through a doughnut at a parolee who was convicted of forcible sodomy and is currently working at a doughnut bakery.]
Does this turn you on?
PParolee
What do you want?
Isn't it a little dangerous for you to be around all these helpless doughnuts?
Guys, check this out. Teddy Kennedy lands in the water at Chappaquiddick on July 18th. Neil Armstrong lands on the moon July 20th. Think about that.
And?
You don't find that amazing?
Nope.
You're learning, Jeffries.
[Upon hearing news that one of their suspects was found dead of an overdose in a small town by the Canadian mounties.]
Poor guy.
Poor guy?
Imagine trying to score smack in a place called Moosonee. Must've been hell. Easier to cop yak turds.
I sure as hell wouldn't drive to Queens to save your ass.
Yeah you would.
Well, that's only because you have a wife and kids.
WMrs. White
He's seeing a new lady friend. A policewoman. I told him to drop her. No offense, but it's my understanding you people don't make any real money, and for that you get to deal with filth.
[smiling] All shapes and sizes.
Just tell me once more, how'd you kill her?
WWhite
[smiles] Thrill-seeker. No. I'm done. Do what you can with what you've got. I don't think you can kill me with it. Pity. I'm fixed on you, and until I'm dead, I'll always be in your head, just like your mother has somebody in her head. We're joined at the hip now, aren't we?
I don't get S&M. I mean, "Hurt me, that turns me on?" Come on, what's up with that?
It starts with the tattoos. Once you get the ink, it's just a matter of time before you're begging to be tied up and spanked.
Yeah, tattoos are just the gateway to the sexual dark side, my friend.
[Stabler slings his arm around Cassidy's shoulders and bares his tattooed arm.]
You guys have finally figured me out, huh?
Seriously. Did you get off on the tiny little pinpricks of pain?
No, I get that from working with you.
The powers that be always protect themselves and the FBI are their hired guns-
[finishes for him] -fronting for the Trilateral Council, the World Bank, and the Mansons.
Masons.
How long you been sleeping with Cassidy?
Uh, I'm not.
Your stomach just dropped 2 floors, Olivia. The unconscious does not lie.
I'm not lying. (beat)Not much.
Is it that obvious?
I'm your partner. For better or worse.
These quotes come from Wikiquote's Criminal Minds pages and are available under the Creative Commons Attribution-ShareAlike License.