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S1 E15

Criminal Minds · Season 1, Episode 15

“Unfinished Business” quotes from Criminal Minds

74,544 quotes · page 2454 of 4970

“Unfinished Business” · Season 1, Episode 15

In this episode: Dean Winchester (940), Damon Salvatore (715), Sam Winchester (665), Olivia Benson (637), Stephen Fry (608), Narrator (554), Clark Kent (523), Nate (486)

DDispatcher

9-1-1, what's your emergency?

WWoman

I'm blue!

DDispatcher

Feelings of sadness and depression are common during the holidays. Let me direct you to the mental health hotline.

WWoman

No, damn it! I'm literally blue!

[Bobby and the 118 arrive]

LAFD. Open up, Please.

WWoman

This is not okay. Ouch. Jeez.

Okay, ma'am, ma'am, please take a seat and tell us what's going on.

WWoman

What's going on? Look at me. I'm a Smurf, and I need a root canal.

Pulse is steady. Pupils are normal. How long has this been going on?

WWoman

The teeth since last week. The "Avatar" look since I woke up. And on top of that, I have to go to work today. On Christmas! I mean, what kind of loser has to work on Christmas? [looks at the 118] Right. Sorry.

Ma'am, do you mind if my guys here take a look around? [nods at Buck and Eddie]

WWoman

Oh, that's fine. You very handsome men, please go look through my messy apartment. Because this wasn't humiliating enough already.

See also If It Smells Like an Ed, Take This Ed and Shove It, Out with the Old, in with the Ed and A Fistful of Ed'

Four thousand eight hundred and twenty, four thousand eight hundred and twenty-four–ooh, I like what you've done with that tunnel–four thousand eight hundred and thirty-one, four thousand eight hundred and thirty-five, that's everybody. Four thousand eight hundred and–[does some calculations on an abacus]–thirty-seven. [placing a label reading Ants 4,837 on his ant farm. The doorbell then rings but upon opening it, he finds nobody there and walks away. This happens 2 more times] Now please–! [a bucket of water falls on his head. He walks away, but the bell rings again. He answers it and a fish hits him in the face. He walks away, but the bell rings yet again, and this time Eddy is there]

Hey, Double D, what took you so long?

Oh. Hello, Eddy. So, what're you doing? Hey. Was that you ringing my doorbell?

Who, me? Nah.

[The scene opens in a garage. An insect is crawling across what appears to be a workshop desk.]

Not so fast, little fella.

Wow, Eddy, cool car.

[Eddy rolls the window back up]

[tapping on the window] Hey dork. Whose car is it, you twerp?

[Eddy cranks up the volume on the car radio, causing Nazz and Kevin to run away]

As I was saying, I am the queen!

And we are your serviants.

Next thing you know, she wants a throne. [cut to Sarah on a makeshift throne] A toast to my big mouth.

Nice boots, Mr. Inventor Smarty Pa- [is propelled into the garage ceiling and immediately falls back down in a daze] Nice pants, Mr. Smarty Boots Nice...

Careful, Eddy, that button is very sensitive.

[buried beneath a mountain of papers] Hey look, my horoscope - 'New enterprise fails to meet expectations'. What's that mean?

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