UFUnusually Flexible Girl
Why!? Why doesn't Captain Hero want to marry me!? [cries] Why doesn't anyone love me? I'M SO ALONE!!
You're not alone. You've got me.
UFUnusually Flexible Girl
I don't want to end up like Nana. She spent her final years alone in a dank, smelly nursing home with nobody around to say "I love you"! [cries] By the time I got back from Spring Break 2003 Daytona Beach MTV Monster Party Jam Week...SHE WAS DEAD!!! [crying]
UFUnusually Flexible Girl
I don't want to die alone!
I don't want to die alone either!
UFUnusually Flexible Girl
We have no choice!
UFUnusually Flexible Girl
Like what?
UFUnusually Flexible Girl
[hugged Wooldoor] I do! You hear that, everyone? I'm marrying...what was your name again?
[Wooldoor whispering]
UFUnusually Flexible Girl
I'm marrying Wooldoor!
[Foxxy finds that she has accidentally run over the rest of the Foxxy 5 after a night of drinking]
FYFoxxy Yella
Why you do this to us, Foxxy?
LLLi'l Foxxy
Why yo run us over?
FPFoxxy Phat
Hey hey hey.
[picking up the phone] I need to call an ambulance! Oh girls, I am so sorry. I never should have been drinking and driving. That is the last time I mix liquor and beer and cough syrup and Kool-Aid and Grape Kool-Aid and Lemon Pledge! [In confessional] And this time I mean it!
[Lyrics to Crashy Smashy Die Die Die]
Splattered 'cross the hood, bloody guts and pain! (Crashy Smashy my oh my.) Compound fracture, puncture lung, bashed in brains! (Crashy Smashy Die Die Die!) Crunchy, cracky, smacky, wacky! All that's left...Is best friend puddin' topped with asphault death! Hey crashy smashy! (Another statistic!) Crash and Die! (Crashy smashy my oh my) Crash and Die! (Crashy smashy die die die) Crash and Die! (Crashy smashy my oh my) Crash and Diiiiiiiie! (Crashy smashy die die die)
[Lyrics to God is Watching Everything You Do]
VFVeggie Fables
God is watching everything you do.
When you get undressed or take a shower.
When you touch yourself for hour after hour.
VFVeggie Fables
God is watching everything you do. And he thinks you're a nasty naughty nympho slut. You sinful filthy whore, you're going to hell. Your flesh will burn. Your bones will churn. Your soul will be torn asunder.
(Clara screams)
VFVeggie Fables
You wretched heathen heretic. Burn in Hell!
So you'd better remember.
VFVeggie Fables
God is watching everything you do.
I'm sorry for thinking impure thoughts. [whips himself]
I'm sorry for being so phallic. [whips himself]
I'm sorry for buying child slaves from third world countries. [whips herself]
CBChinese Boy
Free! [drops his feather duster]
[to the Chinese boy] I said "I'm sorry", not "stop dusting!"
I'm sorry I masturbated! [whips himself] And I'm sorry I helped people! [whips himself again] And I'm sorry I spied on Clara going potty every morning!
You're one to talk, Princess Smell-Your-Wipes. [Clara whips him]
Clara, stop! You mustn't use one of those. God forbids it!
Goddamn it, what's the point of having a secret deep programming room if everybody know where it is?
Clara, please put the clum baby down.
But she's dying! She needs it!
I don't know what to do. I have the consumption.
Then god wants you to have the consumption.
That's just retarded. What if God created clum babies because he wants Clara to live?
Yeah, yeah, the bible says a lot of things...and not very clearly.
We ain't sayin' your interpretation is wrong, but perhaps the bible isn't a set of strict rules, but rather a guide to help each of us to find our personal relationship with the Lord.
I never thought of it that way.
I guess that is possible.
[suddenly furious] ENOUGH FUCKING TALK! IN THE NAME OF GOD, PUT THE FUCKING CLUM BABY DOWN!
[Bob the Cucumber shoots Clara]
[Bob the Cucumber shoots Foxxy]
This wasn't part of the plan! We agreed nobody would get hurt!
[Bob the Cucumber shoots Larry the Tomato]
Holy shit! Bob the Cucumber has gone crazy!
[Bob the Cucumber shoots Spanky]
Please don't kill me! I don't want to die!
Don't be scared, Wooldoor. I saved them all from going to hell, and now I will save your soul too!
Aah! Get off me! Get off me! I'm cured. The clum babies have cured me of my psychosis. I no longer cling to the comforting belief in an all-knowing power. Oh, dear. Did I do this? What have I done?! I thought I was doing god's work! No! No! I'm a monster. I can't live with this. [Gunshot]
CCaptain Colonicus
Captain Hero, you are in direct violation of code 24601, gambling on your own battles.
What? Since when has that been illegal?
CCaptain Colonicus
For as long as stealing, sexual assault and murder have been.
Those are illegal too? Wow, I really am a terrible superhero!
[Wooldoor, dressed as a doctor scans Foxxy until he finds a problem.]
My dear house mates, I'm afraid Foxxy Love does not have a brain tumor. [the other housemates breathe a sigh of relief] I, too, would be relieved, if it didn't happen to be...OPPOSITE DAY!
[dramatic music string]
Wait a minute, I'm confused. Does Foxxy have a brain tumor?
[dramatic music string]
What the hell? Is it opposite day or dramatic music string day?!
[dramatic music string]
Boys and girls...the brain! [the other housemates get out notepads] This is the part of the brain that controls your reflexes. [touches the brain and the patient's leg lifts up] This is the part of the brain that controls your bladder. [touches the brain again and blood squirts up from the patient] Man, that guy needs to see a doctor.
What the hell does this have to do with Foxxy?!
I'm getting to that! This is the part of the brain that controls negative stereotype behavior.
[He touches the brain once and the patient lifts up]
MPMale Patient
[As a Jewish stereotype] Oy! I'll sue you for every penny! And then I'll invest it wisely!
