Big is in town?
Yeah, he's here for a little heart thing.
What, is he on the wait list to get one?
“Unfinished Business” · Season 1, Episode 15
In this episode: Dean Winchester (940), Damon Salvatore (715), Sam Winchester (665), Olivia Benson (637), Stephen Fry (608), Narrator (554), Clark Kent (523), Nate (486)
He did something to me that was so perverse! Okay, I'm just gonna say it: He tried to hold my hand.
You mean to tell me that Smith is a hand-holder? And to think he once served us food.
You laugh, but it's part of a bigger problem. Do you know that I didn't fuck a single or a married guy the whole time Smith was out of town?
[A performance artist is starving herself and refusing to speak while on public display]
AAleksandr
You don't think it's significant?
Oh, please! There are depressed women all over New York doing the exact same thing as her and not calling it art. I mean, if you put a phone up on that platform, it's just a typical Friday night waiting for some guy to call.
Yes, I need glasses, and I'm not ashamed. I have a sexy young man who loves to fuck me, and I'm fabulous.
Have you considered putting that on a T-shirt?
[about Aleksandr] Yesterday I almost did it with him on a park bench in front of children.
What stopped you?
Common decency.
Oh, that.
I could see it going somewhere.
Oh, please, listen, half the time I can't even understand him. We have nothing in common. He's in and out of Europe...
That could be good!
Honey, you're not listening. She only wants him to be in and out of her.
Yes, but in a much less obvious-sounding way.
[to Samantha] I can't believe you would actually consider having a boob job.
[to Samantha] I can't believe you went to Planet Hollywood.
[to a salesclerk, while shopping for a wedding dress] I said no white, no ivory, no nothing that says "virgin". I have a child. The jig is up.
What I don't understand is, if they got it all, why do you need chemo?
[about her doctor] Because he's an asshole.
Evidently there can be something microscopic...
Like his dick?
Excuse me, do you have cancer or Tourette's?
[Samantha is waiting to get an appointment with a top-rated female oncologist, along with other women]
SASister Anne Marie
I've been waiting for two days, and so far no one has gotten in yet.
I was once told I wouldn't be able to get backstage to see Mick Jagger. Well, I did get backstage—and I blew him.
[Sister Anne Marie looks shocked]
CDCab driver
Where to?
Um, Brooklyn, please.
CDCab driver
I don't go to Brooklyn.
Yeah, neither do I.
Why do I think living in Manhattan is so fantastic?
Because it is.
Smith is not gay.
Of course not.
So this makes you his beard.
I'm a beard in a wig.
I don't talk to Steve about my work.
And he doesn't mind?
I think he prefers it that way.
But you guys share everything else.
Because we're in Brooklyn. There's no one else to talk to.
[voiceover] For most women, the goal of a dinner party is to have your friends feel comfortable around your boyfriend.
I think my maid is using my vibrator.
[voiceover] Other times, you wish your friends were not quite so comfortable.
I don't think you're supposed to say "maid" anymore.
I don't think we're supposed to say "vibrator" over dinner.
I'm telling you, I went into the kitchen to get it—
Wait, why was it in the kitchen?
I like to mix it up.
These quotes come from Wikiquote's Criminal Minds pages and are available under the Creative Commons Attribution-ShareAlike License.