I can't believe you took ecstasy from a stranger!
It wasn't a stranger! It was a friend of my friend Bobby's friend Bobby.
Oh, well, then you know it's safe.
“Unfinished Business” · Season 1, Episode 15
In this episode: Dean Winchester (940), Damon Salvatore (715), Sam Winchester (665), Olivia Benson (637), Stephen Fry (608), Narrator (554), Clark Kent (523), Nate (486)
It's amazing. In a courtroom, reasonable doubt can get you off for murder. In an engagement, it makes you feel like a bad person.
[to the girls] That fucking Richard is fucking the entire styles section, and for the first time in my life, I actually give a shit! I think I have monogamy. I must've caught it from you people!
Now it's airborne.
[reading the card Richard wrote Samantha] "Style for style. Best, Richard."
"Best." Yikes.
"Best" is the worst.
Yeah, even Gold and Vogel give you "sincerely."
"Best" is like signing "Not love."
I'm telling you, the fat ass, the farting—it's ridiculous. I am unfuckable. And I have never been so horny in my entire life.
Really?
Yeah. That's why you're supposed to be married when you're pregnant, so somebody is obligated to have sex with you.
Is a three-way with a 21-year-old a bad idea for Richard's birthday?
What are you gonna give him next year? A four-way?
[about her baby shower] But who would I invite besides you guys?
All the bitches that made you go to theirs!
You want out of this, just say it.
I don't wanna have sex once and I want out?
Not just once. What about yesterday?
We were at the opera!
I was bored!
[voiceover] Maybe our mistakes are what make our fate. Without them, what would shape our lives? Perhaps, if we never veered off course, we wouldn't fall in love, or have babies, or be who we are. After all, seasons change. So do cities. People come into your life and people go. But it's comforting to know the ones you love are always in your heart. And if you're very lucky, a plane ride away.
When's the last time you had sex?
[Charlotte pauses to think]
If you had to think about it, it's been too long.
Well, when was the last time you—
10:30 today, at the gym!
[Samantha is posting signs about Richard on a street pole]
FPFemale police officer
Ma'am, it's against city law to deface public property.
This man said he loved me, and I caught him eating another woman's pussy.
FPFemale police officer
Carry on, ma'am.
My friends don't believe you.
Am I dating your friends?
With your track record, I wouldn't put it past you.
[about Brady] He has to get baptized and wear a dress.
Baby's first drag show. It's a very odd tradition.
Oh, don't even get me started. It's all about cleansing this little baby of his sins, when clearly, babies come into the world with a clean slate and we're the ones that fuck 'em up.
So, you're a pessimist, right?
Have we met?
[to Samantha] Maybe later, if you're good, I'll give you a pearl necklace to match.
My father gave me the most beautiful pearl necklace for my sweet sixteen.
Actually, we're talking about the other kind of pearl necklace. You know, when a guy decorates your neck.
I just ran up eleven flights of stairs because I was sure that you were up here fucking someone else.
As you can see, I'm not.
Right now! Right now you're not! But you were, and you will again! And I can't spend my life running up and down stairs wondering when! I thought I could handle this, but I can't. I'm too old. I'm 37, after all.
I told you I'd do my best never to hurt you again, and I meant it.
Right. Your best.
Samantha, I love you.
I love you, too, Richard, but I love me more.
These quotes come from Wikiquote's Criminal Minds pages and are available under the Creative Commons Attribution-ShareAlike License.