Criminal Minds · Season 1, Episode 15
“Unfinished Business” · Season 1, Episode 15
In this episode: Dean Winchester (940), Damon Salvatore (715), Sam Winchester (665), Olivia Benson (637), Stephen Fry (608), Narrator (554), Clark Kent (523), Nate (486)
Logan Roy was such a giant. He was a man of humility, grace, dignity.
[whispers] Who died fishing his iPhone from a clogged toilet.
In public, he was a great communicator.
[whispers] Really?
[Tom softly nods his head]
A powerful man.
[whispers] Oh, man.
[whispers] So they say. Karl blocked it.
[whispers] No.
[whispers] The man lives on Wonder Bread and steak frites. He hadn't had a shit for 20 years.
Can you believe this shit? He's trying to make Pop into a neoconservative. He wasn't a neocon, he was a paleolibertarian. He was practically an anarcho-capitalist.
Yeah, sure. I mean, if you like Benny Hill and Sinatra, does that make you one of those things?
Andreas? Hey, man!
Hey.
Oh, wow. They-- they tell me that you nearly got a bronze at Sochi.
Ah. [chuckles] Another lifetime, you know.
Yeah. Oh, man, that's... that's almost huge, man. You know? Those darn tenths of a second, huh? Tuck!
[Andreas awkwardly smiles and walks away, Hugo walks to Karolina]
Guy's a dick.
Uh... [chuckles] Hey, guys. Uh... [sniffs] Are-- are you for real?
What?
The movie. And what about these fucking press stories? [chuckles] Are you Scooby-Dooing me here? Is that where you went? Hanna-Barbera fucking business school? You're telling me the theme parks are haunted, your big movie is shitty? Are you tanking the deal?
No, man.
No.
No. We're just being open.
Hey, I was just thinking. Do you remember when you asked me when my dad was gonna die?
Yeah, that was a joke, Roman.
Uh-huh. You really couldn't push this a week, could you? You just couldn't like-- There was no part of you that could just be like, "Hey, let's reschedule and move this 'cause, you know, their dad just died and, you know." I mean, my sister's kinda-- She's fucked up about it, and my brother's a mess, and I'm fucking-- I'm gone. I'm like I'm on the fucking-- I'm dead. It's over for me. It's okay, it's fine. But you just drag us out here, you inhuman fucking dogman. You... Crazy.
Easy, brother.
You fucking killed him too. You're the one who did it. You just-- And you did. You drained the life out of him. You dragged this thing out for six fucking months, and then you bring us out here now. You couldn't wait like a few days. You actually couldn't do that for us. No idea, huh? God!
This is good, Rome.
Yeah, shut the fuck up, man. We're not selling to you. Okay? We're not doing that. We are gonna grind you down, man. We are sand in the gears. Every e-mail is gonna take like six months. We're all gonna spend hundreds of millions of dollars, and in the end, you're gonna get fucking bored and move on. It's not happening, okay?
Really?
Yeah. Yeah, I fucking hate you. And if you tell the board I said any of this, I'm just gonna say it was a negotiating tactic, and you know what? Maybe it is. But it's not. So fuck you.
Oh, oh, wait, wait, wait. You just fucked yourself.
Did I?
Good.
Really?
Yeah. [chuckles]
Good.
Congrats, congrats, congrats.
[glasses clinking]
What-- what-- what's going on there?
I don't know.
What is that?
It's--
Is that-- is that the kill list? It is, isn't it?
Wait!
It's just, uh, Jess managed...
Yeah, yes, it is.
...to get a hold of something. Um, uh, early draft. GoJo finance list of potential severance costs. It's highly provisional. It's-- it's caveated, subject to change. It would just be an interpretation.
Well, come on, Gerri. Don't leave us hanging. Who's on it?
Okay, if you insist. In seemingly no particular order, um, just, uh, potentially surplus to requirements are... Ray.
God fuckin' damn it.
Mark.
Shit.
Hugo.
That slalom motherfucker!
Frank.
Naturally. It's just speculation.
Karl.
Let the good times roll.
Wait, wait. What-- wh-- what about Karolina?
Um...
Okay.
She's... not on the list, so retained.
Retained, okay.
And you?
Congratulations.
Thank you.
Uh, also not on the list.
Tom? What about Tom? Tom-- Tom must be on the list.
Mm.
Oh, my God.
I don't see him.
Great fucking trip. Highly fucking productive. So much for being raised by wolves.
Gerri, here's the fucking thing.
What?
You hauling me out of things, telling me to reconsider good calls, and using the F-word freely, it-- it feels... it feels disrespectful.
Uh-huh.
I need you... to believe that I am as good as my dad. Can you do that? Can you do that?
Say it or believe it?
I think... I think I want you. I think I would like this back.
Well then, you... shouldn't have betrayed me. Phony.
If I try to say it. If I try to say the truth... It's that when I met you, all my life... I've been thinking a little bit about money... and how to get money, and how to... keep money. And you didn't ask me in. Shiv, you kept me out. And I always agreed to all the compartments but it seemed to me that I was gonna be caught between you... and your dad. And I really, really, really love my... career and my money. And, you know, the suits, and my watches, and...
[scoffs]
Yeah. Sure, I know. I like nice things, I do. And if you think that's shallow why don't you throw out all your stuff for love. Throw out all your necklaces and your jewels for a date at a three-star Italian. Yeah? Come and live with me in a trailer park. Yeah? Are you coming?
Well, I'd follow you anywhere for love, Tom Wambsgans.
[laughs]
[laughs]
[Tom and Shiv laugh together]
Hey, Karl.
Yeah. Hi. Just-- Just to say good luck, huh?
Thanks, man.
And, uh, just to get some visibility, if that's okay. I-- 'Cause I just heard that, uh, more tweaks have been made in my arena.
It's cool.
Okay, well...
It is cool.
...if I could just take a quick, quick peek.
Karl, man, it's not a good time.
Oh, then if you could just talk me through it. Just-- No, just so I'm comfortable in my own mind that I got your back.
It is all good, Karl.
What we--
Okay? It's all good.
We really need--
Now is not a good time.
Just a sec. Hang on, just--
It's not a good time, Karl.
Oh, really? Well, listen to me. I took a lot of shit from your dad because we've been through the mill. But I've been the CFO of major public companies for over two decades, and I know a thing or two about a thing or two. And if you fuck up his deal, or you try to stand up numbers that I am not comfortable with, I swear to God--
Hey, hey, hey. Hey. Easy. Easy. CEO. CFO.
What? You gonna fire your chief financial officer a week in? Your dad just gone? [laughs] You'd be fucking toast. You have my dick in your hand, Ken. But I've got yours in mine. So let's get real. If you say anything that I don't like up there or make me look foolish, I'll fucking squeal.
[Kendall smiles and pats Karl's arm]
Good luck. Good luck to you, buddy.
Big shoes. Big, big shoes.
[Audience laughs]
[laughs] Big, big shoes. Big, big shoes.
Big shoes. Big hat. Big nervous breakdown.
We think... We think that security plus entertainment is a pretty unbeatable offer. Right? Well, one more thing. How about I told you it was all going to last forever?
Okay. Now we're leaving planet Earth. Glad you're not strapped in?
Oh, fuck! Fuck!
What?
Fuck! [shows Matsson tweet] "Doderick Macht Frei."
That's a very nasty joke, right?
Oh, shit.
Yeah. That's, what, a... it's a Holocaust joke.
Look who it's...
From our acquirer...
Look who it's from.
...so we might need to strategize. Pull the Q and A. Can we let him know? Can we let Kendall know?
Fuck.
Because he's about...
We should try.
...to base jump into a buzzsaw.
Right, right. [on phone call] Are-- are you backstage?
[to Tom] This is kinda good for you 'cause your presentation, not great, and so now no one will be watching.
How am I supposed to follow this? He's just promised them eternal life.
I wanna make what-- I think is-- fairly a historic-- announcement. I'm-- convinced-- that-- Roman Roy-- has-- a-- micro-- dick, and-- always-- gets it wrong.
Here we go. The 5:00 p.m. All good?
Yeah, I'm good, Greg, considering it's my first post-Logan election, and I have Cyd, uh, running around town, spitting poison like a fucking King Cobra with an iPhone. I have, uh, PGN to the left of me, I have FVA to the right. I gotta deliver the best election numbers ever 'cause my bosses wanna rip my heart out as a peace offering...
Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm.
...to all comers. So, no, Greg. You know, I'm a little bit tense. Just a little bit. Little tense.
Well, yeah, I'm feeling pretty good.
These quotes come from Wikiquote's Criminal Minds pages and are available under the Creative Commons Attribution-ShareAlike License.
