V1Vato 1
We all have our own way of killing. Me, I like to kill on the beach.
V2Vato 2
I like to kill to music.
This is kind of embarrassing, but I like to kill on the toilet.
“Unfinished Business” · Season 1, Episode 15
In this episode: Dean Winchester (940), Damon Salvatore (715), Sam Winchester (665), Olivia Benson (637), Stephen Fry (608), Narrator (554), Clark Kent (523), Nate (486)
I killed him hard. Pulled out his heart and showed it to him, and he was like, "Nice."
Okay, Thursday night is Mailroom Monday. We just got our new shipment.
What do you do if the cops come knocking?
We toilet-flush the drugs.
Let's stay one step ahead of the cops. Flush them now.
I like. One step ahead of la policia.
V2Vato 2
Maybe I do have more issues than a magazine stand, but all those magazines are poodle fancy. I never wanted to be a vato. I just want to groom and train poodles.
I secretly groom and train poodles.
Are you guys messing with me? Whenever you turn your back, I secretly groom and train poodles. Watch. Turn your back. (starts grooming a poodle) I'm doing it. I'm doing it!
I can't see. My back is turned.
("Shiny", a metallic drug dealer, beats Xavier as he lies on the ground.)
SShiny
(between punches) Give...me...back...my...son! Wait...sorry...I...mean...drugs!
(Shiny has been tossed into a vat of molten metal.)
SShiny
(crossing himself) I accept Jesus Christ into my heart as my personal savior! Yes, made it!
(He melts.)
I gotta go make water.
Spray it, don't say it.
(Xavier is secretly watching Dr. Pollis apparently performing surgery through praying to God)
(to himself) I'd like to see this guy pray an abortion.
If my dad found out I was using science to help him with his Christian Science, he'd be crushed. Promise me you won't tell him about all this. Daddy can't ever know about my lab. He thinks science is evil, and the Lord heals all.
How does he explain the fact that his own son's legs make me want to puke all over them?
Um, he never says that.
Kid, life is just death in drag.
You're not better than me, okay?! Just because you've created life doesn't make you some kind of god. There's more to life than life!
PDr. Pollis
Well, I tell you; I'd swim through a lake full of water for these cakes. That's the only thing that would put out the raging fire in my belly for these cakes.
MMaddy
That's an odd thing to say.
PDr. Pollis
(Dousing himself in gasoline, after learning that all of his surgeries were played by his son) All that is real is ANNIHILATION!
You need to move on from losing your father back there. You need closure.
Closure?! The explosion hasn't even ended yet!
[Xavier drives through a playground, running over a man. The explosion engulfs the people.]
Does anyone know how to get to the lake?
[Xavier drives through a basketball court. The explosion engulfs the people.]
Does anyone know how to get to the lake?
[Xavier drives through a house, next to KKK members doing jumping jacks. The explosion engulfs the members' costumes.]
Do you know how to get to the lake?
[Xavier drives through a street, taking a right turn. The explosion engulfs the people.]
Do you know how to get to the lake?
[Xavier car-jumps off a ramp and over a set of buses. The explosion jumps off the ramp.]
Does anyone know how to get to the lake?
[Xavier drives onto a roller coaster on its tracks. The explosion engulfs parts of the track.]
Oh no! I'm heading right towards the Cyclone.
[Xavier car-jumps off the roller coaster. The explosion jumps off too.]
Does anyone know how to get to the lake?
[Xavier stops onto the side of the street.]
Can you tell me how to get to the lake?
ASArrow Salesman
How are you going to get there? By car?
I'm driving right now.
ASArrow Salesman
Okay. First, you're gonna wanna get in your car. Then, you're gonna wanna start your car.
[Xavier looks at the rear view mirror, seeing the explosion approaching.]
ASArrow Salesman
A lot of people get half-way to the lake and they realize they forgot to start their car.
What?
ASArrow Salesman
I'm just joshing you.
[Xavier looks again at the rear view mirror, seeing the explosion approaching.]
ASArrow Salesman
That's just lake humor.
Uh, I'll find it myself.
[Xavier drives away.]
ASArrow Salesman
Man. I'll never sell these arrows.
[The explosion engulfs the Arrow Salesman.]
These quotes come from Wikiquote's Criminal Minds pages and are available under the Creative Commons Attribution-ShareAlike License.