“Unfinished Business” quotes from Criminal Minds

Twilight

Okay, take this down... [watches Pinkie Pie's through binoculars attached to her wheelchair] Twitchy ... tail.

Spike

[writing] Twitchy tail ... huh?! [screaming] Twitchy Tail!!

Twilight

Hush Spike, we can't let Pinkie know we're here, remember?

Spike

Something's gonna fall! Something's gonna fall! Run for your lives! Ahahahaaaah! [runs off]

Twilight

[angered] Ahh Spike, honestly, you're overreacti-

Rainbow Dash

Now that you've learned the elements of a good cheer, let's hear one!

Fluttershy

[quietly] Yay.

Rainbow Dash

Ugh, you're gonna cheer for me like that? Louder.

Fluttershy

[quietly] Yay.

Rainbow Dash

Louder.

Fluttershy

[quietly] Yay.

Rainbow Dash

LOUDER!!!

Fluttershy

[rears and inhales loudly, yet quietly] Yay... [Rainbow Dash falls over in disgust] Too loud?

[about Rainbow Dash] Didn't you see how nervous she was?

Applejack

Nervous? Have you spit yer' bit or somethin'? She was tootin' her own horn louder than the brass section of a marching band!

Oh puh-lease! I put on enough fashion shows to recognize stage fright when I see it.

Rainbow Dash

I just wish I could've met the Wonderbolts when they were awake. [a hoof taps on her shoulder. She turns around to see Spitfire, at the head of the Wonderbolts] Oh, my gosh, oh, my gosh, oh, my gosh, oh, my gosh, oh, mygosh!

Spitfire

So you're the little pony who saved our lives. We really wanted to meet you, and say thanks.

Rainbow Dash

Oh, my gosh, oh, my gosh, oh, my gosh, oh, my gosh, oh, mygosh!

Sweetie Belle

Um, that doesn't look like a table.

Scootaloo

[unsurely] We were making a table?

Apple Bloom

Somepony needs to put this thing out of its misery!

Scootaloo

We are definitely not Cutie Mark Crusader Carpenters.

Fluttershy

Now that we've gotten that out of the way, how about a game?

Apple Bloom

A game?

Fluttershy

It's called "Shh."

Scootaloo

What's that?

Fluttershy

Well, it's a game about who can be quiet the longest. Sound fun? [the Crusaders appear uninterested] I'm the world champ, you know. I bet you can't beat me! [squeaks, holds her breath for a few moments]

Scootaloo

...I lose!

Sweetie Belle

Me too!

Apple Bloom

Me three!

Scootaloo

What are you doing?

Apple Bloom

Callin' for the chicken!

Scootaloo

That is not how you call a chicken!

Apple Bloom

Oh, and you know how to call a chicken!

Scootaloo

I know that's not the way!

Apple Bloom

Then show me.

Scootaloo

I don't have to show you!

Apple Bloom

You're just chicken.

Scootaloo

Am not!

Apple Bloom

Oh wait, now I know how to call a chicken! Scootaloo! Scoot-Scootaloo!

Scootaloo

[sarcastically] That's so funny I forgot to laugh. [walks off]

Apple Bloom

You also forgot how to call a chicken.

Sweetie Belle

Guys, we are not gonna find our special talent by arguing.

Apple Bloom

That's it! maybe arguing's our special talent!

Scootaloo

Is not!

Apple Bloom

Is too!

Scootaloo

Is not!

Apple Bloom

Is too![showing scootaloo her flank] Anything yet?

Scootaloo

No.

Apple Bloom

Darn!

Applejack

Cutie Mark Crusaders, welcome to your new clubhouse! [awkward pause] Well, don't thank me all at once. This was my clubhouse when I was your age. Sure it hasn't been used in a while, but it's empty and on a secluded, private part of the farm. And it's all yours. It just needs a little, uh, TLC.

Scootaloo

TLC as in "Tender Loving Care" or "Totally Lost Cause".

Scootaloo

I'm just no good at lyrics. Coming up with words is, like, really hard.

Sweetie Belle

Oh, they can't be that bad; "With our cutie marks, we'll rock Equestria. We use our stomachs to... digest-ia"? Um? Well, these are good but...

Scootaloo

Ok, so that's six wooden planks, 4x8 plywood, a box of nails, four cans of paint, and four brushes. Anything else?

Sweetie Belle

Yeah, instructions on how to use six wooden planks, 4x8 plywood, a box of nails, four cans of paint, and four brushes.

Twilight

"Ghosts, Goblins, and Ghoulish Figures"? Good heavens, girls, what do you need a book like this for?

Scootaloo

You'll see, thanks Twilight! We'll give it back as soon as we're done with it.

Twilight

What do you think they're up to?

Spike

I have no idea, and I don't know if I should be excited or scared to find out.

Applejack

Heavens to betsy! Now, I'm used to pickin' myself up and dustin' myself off, but Rarity won't even touch mud 'less it's imported.

[after Rover inadvertently calls her a mule] Did- did you just call me a mule?

Uh...

Mules are ugly. Are you saying I too am ugly? [starts bawling]

What's this noise?

[crying] He called me ugly!!! [Spot flashes an angry glare towards Rover]

No! Mule; I said 'mule'.

An old, ugly mule! And it's true! Just look at me! I- I used to be beautiful, but now-!

No, you're still beautiful pon- er, Miss Rarity.

[sobbing] You're just saying that!

No! You're still pretty-

And nice!

I don't believe you!! You never liked me!!! [continues crying even harder]

I must say the working conditions in here are simply dreadful. Musty and damp, it's going to wreak havoc on my mane. And this air is stifling, suffocating. And when I try to take a deep breath, the stench of all you dogs makes me nauseated. You look and smell like if you haven't bathed in weeks. Have you never heard of soap? You could all do with a good round of soap and water. water, I'm terribly thirsty. Could I please have some water?

Good gracious, I can't take this anymore. BE QUIET, PONY!

And that's another thing. I would appreciate if you stopped calling me "pony". I am a lady and I wish to be addressed as such. So you may call me "Miss" or "Rarity" or "Miss Rarity".

ENOUGH! Your whining - i-i-it hurts!

"Whining"? I am not "whining". I am complaining. Do you want to hear "whining"? [starts whining] This is whining! Oooh, this harness is too tight! It's going to chafe! Can't you loosen it?! Oh, it hurts and it's so rusty! Why didn't you clean it first?! It's gonna leave a stain, and the wagon's getting heavy! Why do I have to pull it?!

Aaah! Make it stop!

Stop whining!

[whining] But I thought you wanted whining!

Just because I'm a lady doesn't mean that I cannot handle myself in a sticky situation. I had them wrapped around my hoof the entire time.

Twilight

I can't wait to write to Princess Celestia to tell her what you taught me today.

Me? What did I teach you?

Twilight

Just because some pony is ladylike doesn't make her weak. In fact, by using her wits a seemingly defenseless pony can be the one who outsmarts and outshines them all.