[pouring a cup of tea for Professor Frith and offers it to him] This should make you feel better, Mr. Frith. Now, tell us what happened to you, you poor man.
What's happened to me isn't important. What's important is what might happen to you and what happened thousands of years ago. The clothing in this sack tells the story. [takes the Mayan princess' outfit out of his sack] This belonged to a Mayan princess a long time ago. The princess loved cookies. Each day, the royal baker would whip up a jar full of cookies for the princess. The cookie jar was (then) brought to the princess by her most trusted royal Poohbah. And before he would give the cookies, the greedy Poohbah would steal cookies from the jar and sell them for his own profit. One day, the baker caught the Poohbah and went to tell the princess, but the Poohbah got to her first. The Poohbah presented the princess with cookie jars that were only half-full, and said the baker was stealing the missing cookies. The princess was outraged, and ordered the baker to have his mouth sewn shut, his eyebrows plucked, and his body mummified. Most unpleasant. [chuckles] That baker is now a centuries-old mummy. And he's risen. And he's seeking revenge. And he's on his way to this very spot at this very moment.
Why here? Why us?
[takes out a scroll from his sack and opens it] Here is an ancient drawing of the princess and the Poohbah.
[Eustace and Muriel gasp in surprise, seeing that they look just them]
They look just like we do!
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