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S1 E2

Count Duckula · Season 1, Episode 2

Don Diego and Duckula in “Vampire Vacation”

Don Diego

Just because I'm tall and handsome and brave and good and kind and wonderful... I-I-I- have happen to chop up one or two of the villagers into tiny little bits now and again... they dislike me! Ha ha, ha ha... Well, except for the really fat ones. I'm saving them for tonight.

Duckula

Tonight?

Don Diego

Tonight is a fiesta for all the vampires from all over Spain! There'll be music, and a finger buffet with the real fingers. (evilly) Then - then - we chop up a whole village, then there is bingo to follow!

Duckula

Stop this! Stop this! Stop it, Don Diego! No! I cannot let you do this!

Don Diego

Oh, you don't like bingo? Ok, we play something else. You choose.

Duckula

Well, I wouldn't mind playing... - no listen! I mean, you cannot chop up a whole village! It's not right! I will do anything to stop you.

Don Diego

Anything?

Duckula

Anything.

Don Diego

Ahahaha!!! Then tonight, you will fight the horrible bull in all of Spain - El Loco!

Duckula

OK, listen - if I fight El Loco, will you let the villagers go?

Don Diego

I will...I will let bits of them go.

Duckula

Let ALL of them go, or no fight!

Don Diego

I can't even keep the noses?

Duckula

No, no noses!

Don Diego

OK. But remember - El Loco is the most nastiest thing on four legs. He'll ripped up your body, and there'll be bits of you you didn't even know you had. Aha!! Ahahaha!

Duckula

Ha! I'm not afraid of you, Don Diego! OR El Loco! 'Til tonight then! (Don Diego flits off)

Duckula

AAAAGH! AAGH! Nanny, Nanny, I'm gonna die!!

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