Roland, Denise and others in “Sacrifices”

You would not believe this. These are Joan's nanny requirements.

Oooh. I can't wait.

[reading off paper] Great parental instincts, infant CPR certificate, clean driving record, stable family background, advanced college degree or experience as a pediatric nurse.

Is that all?

She calls me every hour with another addition.

So Mary Poppins need not apply?

I barely qualify.

How's the mom thing going?

It's like she and Joan have this secret club. They look at me, then they look at each other and then they laugh.

[awkwardly] Right, it's kinda like that.