[the WrestleMania 23 Money in the Bank ladder match participants are in the ring]
Welcome to a very special edition of the Cutting Edge. Now as we all know, the third annual Money in the Bank ladder match takes place this Sunday at WrestleMania. I of course won the first Money in the Bank, cashed it in, and went on to become WWE Champion. Actually, I've won ladder matches at WrestleManias 16, 17, and 21. As a matter of fact, I've won more ladder matches than all of you combined. Add to the fact that I've never been beaten at WrestleMania. And what makes any of you think you have a shot this Sunday? And, and Matt, Matt I'll start with you. Because I'm shocked that you're even on WrestleMania. [Matt Hardy takes the microphone]
Oh I'm on WrestleMania. And I'm gonna be in your face. And you're not the only one with experience in ladder matches. I've won quite a few of these myself. And at WrestleMania, I'm gonna beat you up bad. So bad that you're gonna be lying flat on your back. Much like your ex-girlfriend.
Okay, okay, that's it, you're done speaking! And I can do that because this is my show! Now King Bookah, hopefully, hopefully you have something intelligent to say.
Indeed. Indeed I do. Now I realize, some of you have won championships in the past. But none, none of you have reigned, reigned successfully as King Booker! Now, the rest of you lowly, lowly peasants, [Finlay takes the microphone]
Peasants?! I am sick of this verbal diarrhea! I feel like I'm on here among a bunch of old women! You didn't like that, chisel-chin? You feelin' froggy? Go ahead and jump! [Randy Orton takes the microphone]
Fit, Fit, take it easy now, don't hurt Edge's feelings! Don't hurt Edge's feelings, Fit, you see, 'cause he might use that as an excuse to duck out of this match! Just like you've ducked out of every match you'd been scheduled to wrestle in for the past month.
Now, now, Randy, you know that's not true, okay? [Mr. Kennedy takes the microphone]
Oh oh no, no. That is true. No it it, it's pretty obvious to me, it's pretty obvious to everybody out here that you, you don't wanna fight tonight, do ya? You don't wanna fight, but you know what, you might as well just step aside. EVERYBODY here might as well step aside, because you're looking at the man who is gonna be Mr. Money in the Bank. You're looking at MR.... [Edge takes the microphone]
Okay, okay, very nice, very nice! Riveting stuff, repeat your name! Oh and that brings us, that brings us to Jeff Hardy. And Jeff I, I'd ask you for a comment but all you've really said for the last few months is, [does Jeff Hardy's signature entrance pose] Ha! So, so maybe I should close this one out for you, huh?
Hey man that's real funny. You know, this is my first WrestleMania in five long years. Therefore, I plan to do what I always do in ladder matches, and that's to STEAL THE ENTIRE SHOW! Even if it means going through my own brother. I'll do what it takes to climb that ladder, grab the briefcase, and win Money in the Bank.
Okay enough! Enough! [crowd chants "CM Punk"] Oh and last, but certainly not least, that brings us to Chicago's own, CM Punk! [crowd cheers loudly] Cheer it up. So you're straight edge, right? Your only addiction is competition, right? Well my addictions are sex, violence, and championship gold around my waist.
Edge, right now, the only thing it looks like you're addicted to, is running your mouth. [Edge shoves Punk, resulting in a brawl]
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