Angela Merkel in “Unfinished Business”

[singing] I thought they were my friends

I thought that we were cool

Now I'm like the schlummy dummy no-one likes at school

Behind my back they're laughing

Especially the Brits

They're like, "Angela, whatever."

Those stupid Brexit shits

On the refugees I acted

The moment when I ask for help they all gang up on me

All on my own

Here I am

All on my own

Who gives a damn?

Ratings at an all time low

Oh, man, it makes me blue

Oh, Birgit, baby, be a buddy

Tell me vhat to do

Birgit: Don't let those schweine get you down

They do not have a clue

You're the EU anchor EU banker

That's why they hate you

Angela Merkel: Too true!

Birgit: We've always worked things out

Since we were oh so small

Angela Merkel: So small!

Birgit: Dreaming of another life on the right side of the wall

Angela Merkel: I used to be so va-va-voom

It all was so light-hearted

Now when I walk into a room it's like, "Mein Gott, who farted?"

All on my own

[Birgit: No, you're not, my Chancellorette. Here I am]

All on my own

[Birgit: Nein, nein. Here I am I give a damn]

Up scheisse creek with no paddle

They've brought me to my knees

So now it's just the two of us

Birgit: And a million refugees