Amy: Ashley, what's your point?
Ashley: My point is that I hope you don't make the same mistake twice. Not that you could, exactly.
Amy: What is wrong with you? I'm not interested in Ricky! I don't want to talk to him. I have to talk to him. He has to go along with the adoption, or there's no sense in even interviewing couples.
Ashley: And if he doesn't go along with it?
Amy: Then I'll just drop out get a full-time, put the baby in daycare, and embrace teen motherhood. Sound good to you?
Ashley: You're so dramatic.
Amy: I'm pregnant. I'm 15!
Ashley: Yeah, yeah. You're pregnant, and you're 15. You're not the only pregnant teenager in the world, so stop feeling so sorry for yourself.
Amy: I'm not feeling sorry for myself, I'm doing the responsible thing by trying to find two adults who could provide my baby with a stable home and a loving family.
Grace: (to Adrian) You're the 'b' word!
Adrian: Oh, the 'b' word? What's the 'b' word, Grace?
Grace: You know what the 'b' word is, Adrian, because that's what you are.
Adrian: Say it!
Grace: No, I'm not gonna say it, I'm gonna say something else.
Adrian: What, a prayer? Are you gonna say a prayer you little bible thumping two-faced virgin?!
Grace: Yeah, maybe I will (puts hands together like she is praying) God, help Adrian, because she's a bitch!
AAnne
No, I'm not kidding you. And they like me so much that they're letting me have an assistant. You speak Spanish, right?
AAnne
Okay, well, we better go, because we start at 3:30.
AAnne
Our job. Come on, let's go. I'll tell you about it in the car.
Mom, I've had a really long day. I just ate four $5 chocolate bars, and I don't feel too well. Maybe we could start tomorrow.
AAnne
$20 worth of chocolate? You're gonna have to work at least three hours for that, and maybe more, after taxes.
(to Ricky) So who's your second choice if you don't get Amy and/or the baby? I mean, I know you're used to getting what you want, but let's just say this time, you don't. Who you gonna go after? Adrian? Oh no, that's right. Adrian's in love with her brother right now. So what about Grace? Grace isn't gonna marry you. She's probably gonna become a doctor. She'll probably marry a doctor. I mean, she's a doctor's daughter, so she's a little out of your league, don't you think? Oh, and by the way, if you and Amy don't find a couple to adopt the baby, you're gonna be paying child support for the next 18 years. How you gonna do that? I mean, you don't just get to call yourself the daddy without being financially responsible for the child. Think about that. Child support every month for the next 18 years. So if you're just using the baby as a way to get to Amy, just keep in mind that's gonna cost you. But you know that, right? You shouldn't take things you can't pay for, Ricky.
Amy: No time for waffles. We're gonna be late for school! And by the way, Ashley, yogurt is much healthier than chocolate chip waffles.
Ashley: The pregnant girl's concerned about being tardy?
Amy: Yes. And I'm concerned about your health.
Ashley: Well, until and unless I'm living in your stomach, leave my health to me.
Amy: Do you really think I don't care about my baby?
Ashley: No. You care too much, yet not enough.
Amy: What does that mean?
George: Something good, right Ash?
Ashley: You care enough to take care of the baby before he's born, but you don't care enough to take care of him after that?
Amy: I can't! Someone else has to do that. Why can't you understand that?
Ashley: I can't understand it, and I don't think the baby will understand it when he grows up, either.
Amy: This is not some weird group project, Ashley. This is a human being, and I am responsible for this human being. He's my son. I have to do the right thing. I have to do what's best for him. I have to find him a home.
Ashley: Think about yourself. Think about doing the best thing for yourself, because maybe it's the best thing for you and your baby to stay together.
Amy: I can't think about that, because it's not...it can't be.
Ashley: Why can't it? Why do you insist on believing that this is a bad thing that happened? Because that's what other people think? Please listen to me, Amy. Please. I know you want to be in the band, but it's not the band that's important to you. It's music. You love music, and you can still play your French horn when the baby comes. And I know school is important to you, but really, isn't it education that's important? You'll get the education that you want somehow, Amy. I know you will, because you're smart. You've always been smart, so you'll figure out school. You'll figure out a way, and you'll find some work, something where you can earn some money. You can do this, Amy. You really can. It's possible that this baby's a good thing for all of us. It's possible that we can all learn how to live from this and be happy. Come on. so Mimsy has Alzheimer's, and Mom and Dad are getting a divorce, and the family's splitting up, and you got pregnant the first time you had sex. So what? Maybe it's all good. Maybe if it isn't, let's just say it is.
Amy: When did you move away from the dark side?
Ashley: As soon as I could.
Anne: Amy, I know that you want to keep the baby. I can feel it, and while I don't know how I feel about you taking on motherhood at 15 years old, I think that you could do it, if that's what you really wanted. And that's what I told Reverend Stone today.
Amy: (hugs her) I got a job! A job with insurance and daycare, and Ben got a job, and Ricky got a job, and everyone wants to help, Mom. Everyone. I think I can do it, if only you'll let me do it. Will you? Will you let me keep the baby? I'll be a good mom. I promise I will.
Anne: Of course, Amy. Of course you can, and I will help you as much as I can. But Amy, this is going to be your baby, and you have to take care of him, and it's not gonna be easy.
Amy: (crying) Thank you. Thank you! I know that I can be a good mom, because I've got the best mom in the whole world.
Shana: Are you the slut that had oral sex with Jack and broke him up with his girlfriend?
Grace: Oh no! No, no, no. This is, um, the slut's condo, but I'm just answering the door.
Amy: Why do we keep hiding things from Mom?
George: Because it's fun, and because she reacts badly to almost everything, and because it's good practice for all the other things I'll have to keep from her when I move out of here.
Amy: (about Madison not getting invited to the baby shower) I'll call Adrian. I'm sure it was an oversight.
Madison: Really? It didn't have anything to do with all the stuff we said about Ben?
Lauren: Madison!
Madison: Well, we don't think he's pretentious. We don't care that he has a driver.
Lauren: Right. He's a great guy.
Madison: Yeah, and we don't care that he's taking you away from us, or that you love him more than you love us. We don't feel like you've tossed us away at all.
Amy: Madison, I didn't know you felt that way about Ben...until now.
Madison: My point is that we don't.
Anne (to Amy): It's okay. It's all gonna be okay.
Amy: No, it's not gonna be okay! I'm starving, and I'm kind of scared!
Anne: Yeah, I know. It's scary giving birth, but it's okay. I'm gonna be here. I'll be here the whole time. And think of it this way. The flip side of fear is excitement, so let's get excited. What are you gonna name him?
Amy: What am I gonna name the baby? I'm going to name the baby?
Anne: Well, yeah. Who else do you think's gonna name the baby?
Amy: I don't know. I'm a minor. I thought maybe you and Dad? I mean, I thought I'd suggest a few names, but really, a name is a serious thing. He's gonna be stuck with it his whole life, and now is not the time for me to be coming up with some name. I'm busy here. I can't think of anything other than that burger, and I just don't see how this is gonna work. I mean, how do we even know I have a birth canal? (Anne can hardly believe what she's just said) What? I don't know anything about anything, other than the French horn!
Doctor (to Amy): The thing is, we don't want to give you the epidural too soon.
Amy: Yeah. I'm worried about too late!
Doctor: I've done this before, you know. I bet I know just about the perfect time.
Amy: Yeah, well, I guess you do know better than me since I never went to that stupid, stupid class.
Doctor: Hey, that anger is good, useful energy, and it might speed things along. You feel free to let it go. I'll let your mom know it's gonna be a little while longer.
Amy: She's the one who didn't make me go to that class when I should have!
Doctor: Yeah. Just like that. Let it go.
Ashley: So, how's my little nephew? What's his name?
Amy: You know what? Why don't you name him? You're the one who talked me into keeping him. Go ahead, Ashley. You have the honor. And do it quickly before Mom and Dad get in here and want to help.
Ashley: I may have talked you into keeping him, but hey, you're the one who's really going to be keeping him, so...John.
Amy: I like John. Do we know a John? Why John?
Ashley: It goes with Juergens. John Juergens.
Amy: Yeah. It goes with Boykevich, as well.
Ashley: Yeah, go with John. He needs a nice, clean, simple name. That kid's life will be complicated enough.
George: (while waiting for Amy to give birth) If this were 50 years ago, I'd be in a nearby bar, having a drink and waiting for a phone call.
Ashley: If this was 50 years ago, Amy would be in a home, and we'd be saying she's at special music college in the Midwest.
George: Yeah. We would have made your mom wear a pillow for nine months. Then she would have given birth suddenly while we were on vacation in the Midwest. Oh, those were the good old days.
Ashley: Ah, yes. The Era of Shame. Too bad we missed that one, huh?
