Will and Charlie in “Unfinished Business”

Will

I was rejecting a pass from her while trying to talk her out of what they call at TMI a 'take-down piece' of one of the desperate housewives of New Jersey.

Charlie

Real Housewives.

Will

Who gives a shit.

Charlie

Definitely not me.

Will

And the tuxedo's off the rack.

Charlie

Did you grope her?

Will

No! I-I-I-- I gently touched her to block her as she was coming in for a kiss. I blocked her. I was the victim of an unwanted sexual advance. But more important, I was fighting the good fight.

Charlie

Why were you fighting any fight?

Will

I was trying to get her to not write the take-down piece.

Charlie

Why?

Will

Why?

Charlie

Yeah.

Will

I'll tell you why. Because I'm on a mission to civilize.

Charlie

How's it going so far?

Will

Progress is slow, but I'm in it for the long haul.

Charlie

You want Publicity to draft a statement?

Will

About the mission?

Charlie

The Page Six piece.

Will

Absolutely not.

Charlie

Good.

Will

What did you call me up here for?

Charlie

Mostly to laugh at you.