[Ellie just knifed a soldier in the knee, prompting everyone to spring up. The soldier points a gun at Joel, who is standing right in front of Ellie]
FSFEDRA Soldier
Get out of the fuckin' way!
JoelWhoa! Whoa! [looks back at Ellie] We can fix this!
FSFEDRA Soldier
Move. Move.
[Joel remembers. The same scenario 20 years later, but with a different kid. The soldier prepares to fire...]
Joel
RRAAAHHHH!!!! [leaps at the soldier]
[Joel hammers away at the soldier. He continuously throws punches, letting out all of the rage from Sarah's death, whilst Ellie looks on in awe.]
[As Ellie and Sam play a game of soccer underground, Joel and Henry -- a self-described "FEDRA Collaborator" -- talk.]
Joel
If you were collaborating to take care of him, I... I shouldn't have said what I said. I don't know your situation. And I'm not saying you should let it go, but... all things considered, it seems kinda cruel. To send a whole army after you for that.
HHenry
You know, I wasn't, uh... exactly telling you the truth before. About me not killing someone. There was a man, a great man. Now, he was never afraid. Never selfish. And he was always forgiving. Have you ever met someone like that? The kinda man you'd follow anywhere. I mean, I wanted to. I would've. Yeah, but, uh... Sam, he, uh... he got sick. Leukemia. Yeah, anyway, um... There was one drug that worked and, well, big shock -- there wasn't much left of it. And it belonged to FEDRA. And if I wanted some, it was gonna take something big. So I gave them something big. That one great man. The leader of the Resistance movement in Kansas City. And Kathleen's brother. Yeah, so, you still think they should take it easy on me? Or am I the bad guy? I don't know what you're waiting on, man. I am the bad guy 'cause I did a bad guy thing. But you get it, though. You might not be her father, but you were someone's. See, I can tell.
[Joel stands.]
Joel
We've waited long enough.
[Joel is in the midst of discussing Tommy's group's run to Boston, pondering handing Ellie off to the group.]
Joel
She's immune.
Joel
Ellie. She got infected, but she didn't get sick. [off Tommy's incredulity] Tommy. Tommy, I saw her get bit myself. That was months ago. Months. She's immune.
[Tommy pulls up a chair and slowly sits next to his brother.]
TTommy
From the beginning.
Joel
It was Marlene. She hired us to smuggle her to some Fireflies. It went bad. Tess got bit. She made me swear to take the kid. It was her dying wish, what the hell was I supposed to do? We made it as far as KC, and then... y'know, she saved my life there, from another kid. Five years ago, I would've destroyed him, but she had to shoot him to save me. Fourteen years old. Because I was too slow, and too fucking deaf to hear him coming. I saw... I saw a man kill his own brother to save her, while I just watched. And today, I thought that dog was gonna tear her apart because it smelled something on her. And all I did was stand there. I couldn't... move. I couldn't think of anything to say, I just... I was so afraid. You think I can still handle things, but... But I'm not who I was. I'm weak. Lately, there are these moments where the fear comes up out of nowhere and my heart feels like it's stopped. And I have dreams, every night.
TTommy
What kinda dreams?
Joel
I don't know. I can't remember. I just know that, when I wake up... I've lost something. I'm failing in my sleep! It's all I do. It's all I've ever done, is fail her! Again and again and again...
TTommy
You want me to take her.
Joel
I'm just gonna get her killed, I know it. I know it. I have to leave her.
Joel
I mean, it's why you took off on me, right? To make up for the things we did. Well, here's your chance to bring your kid into a better world. You're younger than me, you're still strong, you said yourself -- you'll come back. You have to take her! You can't tell anyone, not even Maria. Tommy, you're the only one I trust. If anyone else sees those bites on her, what's under her skin, they'll... they'll shoot her! It's the last thing I'll ever ask of you. I swear.
[A long beat as Tommy weighs it over.]
TTommy
I'll take her out at dawn.
[Joel enters Ellie's room to find her sitting by the window, reading a 20-year old diary from the previous occupant]
Is this really all they had to worry about? Boys... movies... deciding which shirt goes with which skirt? It's bizarre.
Joel
Listen, umm...
Joel
I came here to talk to you.
No, why are you still here? If you're gonna ditch me, ditch me.
Joel
What exactly did you hear?
"I have to leave her, you have to take her." You know, I stood up for you today, because I thought... [she trails off]
Joel
I made this decision for your own good. You'll be way better off with Tommy. He knows the area better than I do -
[Stands up] Do you give a shit about me or not!?
Joel
'Course I do!
Then what are you so afraid of? [long beat] I'm not her, you know. [another long beat, as Joel processes what she said] Maria told me about Sarah, and I -
Joel
[interrupting, in a quiet, angry tone] Don't. Don't say another word.
[approaching him] I'm sorry about your daughter, Joel. But I have lost people too.
Joel
You have no idea what loss is.
Everybody I have cared for has either died, or left me... [shoves him hard, her voice rising to a shout] Everybody, fucking except for you! So don't tell me I'd be safe with somebody else, because the truth is I'd just be more scared!
[beat]
Joel
You're right. You're not my daughter. And I sure as hell ain't your dad. Now come dawn, we're going our separate ways.
[Joel and Ellie enter an abandoned medical facility]
Joel
No. Army. They put these places up all around. First few days after the outbreak. Emergency medical camps. Obviously didn't last. They had me in one just like this.
Joel
No, she was gone already.
Oh. So what was wrong with you?
Joel
[points to the scar on his head] It was for this.
Ah, the guy who shot and missed? I figure that would've happened later.
Joel
Nope. Second day.
Well, I gotta hand it to the army people, they were way better at stitching you up than I was...
Joel
It was me. [Ellie turns to look back at him] I was the guy who shot and missed.
[Ellie looks horrified. Joel takes the rifle off his back and perches on a concrete barrier. Ellie comes and sits beside him]
Joel
There's no story. Sarah died, and I couldn't see the point anymore. Simple as that. And I wasn't scared either. I was ready. I couldn't have been more ready. And when I... when I... [motions] went to pull the trigger, I flinched. Still don't know why. Anyway, the reason I'm telling you all this is -
I know why you're telling me all this.
Joel
Yeah, I reckon you do.
[beat]
So time heals all wounds, I guess?
Joel
[turns to look at her] It wasn't time that did it.
[Ellie looks at him, stunned, as she realises what he meant]
[tearfully] I'm glad that... that didn't work out.
Joel
Me too. [dries his eyes]
We should probably get going.
Joel
Yup.
JMJavier Miller
Did I ever tell you about that time I stole a candy bar? I was... ten? Grandpa found out. Made me give it back, made me apologize to the cashier. And then we went home. Just before I got out of the car, man, he just... [mimes a punch] He broke my jaw. There was blood everywhere. Grandma thought I was dead. My mouth was wired shut for two months; everybody knew why. It was humiliating...
Joel
If you know what it feels like, then why?
JJavier
That's not why I'm telling you this. Okay, yeah, I've hit you. And I've hit Tommy. But never like that -- not even close. I mean, maybe I go too, far I... I don't know, I just... I don't know. But I'm doing a little better than my father did. And, y'know, when it's your turn... I hope you do a little better than me.
[Ellie's last conversation with Joel - after seemingly walking past him on his porch the night before his death, she doubles back and returns to him. He places the guitar down and gets up, picking up his mug and sipping it as he comes to stand next to her.]
Joel
Coffee.
Joel
Um... The people that came through last week. I'm a little embarrassed for what I traded to get it, but it's not bad.
[Long pause]
[referring to their earlier confrontation] I had Seth under control.
Joel
Yeah, I know.
And I don't wanna ever hear about you taking me off patrol again.
Joel
Okay. [Another long pause] So, Dina... Is she your girlfriend now?
No. No, she... It was just one kiss. Didn't mean anything. I don't know why she did that.
Joel
But... you do like her?
[sighs. To herself] I'm so stupid.
Joel
Look, I don't know what Dina's intentions are, but... well, she'd be lucky to have you.
[turning to look at him, her tone now more confrontational] You're such an asshole. You lied to me. You looked me in the eyes, and you lied, and it was the same face. The same fucking look. But I think I knew already. I knew this whole time. So, I'm gonna give you one last chance. Tell me what happened with the Fireflies. If you lie to me again, we're done. [His face crumpling, Joel nods] Were there other immune people? [Joel takes a moment, but finally shakes his head] Were there raiders? [he shakes his head again] Could they have made a cure? [Joel visibly struggles, but finally nods. Ellie, shattered, begins to cry herself] Did you...? [Without needing her to finish, Joel nods again] And Marlene? [He nods again, and Ellie begins to breathe heavily as the emotion overwhelms her]
Joel
Makin' a cure... would've killed you.
Then I was supposed to die! That was my purpose! My life would've fucking mattered! But you took that from me! You took it from everyone.
Joel
Yes. And I'll pay the price... because you're gonna turn away from me. But if somehow, I had a second chance at that moment... I would do it all over again.
[bitterly] Because you're selfish.
Joel
[in a choked voice] Because I love you. In a way you... you can't understand. Maybe you never will. But if that day should come... If you should ever have one of your own... well, then... I hope you do a little better than me.
[takes a deep breath] I don't think I can forgive you for this. But I would like to try.
The Last of Us · 20 quotes