Kalinda Sharma quotes from The Good Wife

Alicia

I wanted his problems out of the office. What does that say about me?

Kalinda

It says you're becoming a lawyer.

Kalinda

[after being subpoenaed to Peter's appeal] I'm not testifying.

Glenn Childs

Then you're going to jail.

Kalinda

Look, I've got nothing to offer.

Glenn Childs

You have everything to offer. You know you do. Peter Florrick lied on the witness stand. Tell the truth, he spends the next nine years in prison.

Kalinda

Glenn.

Glenn

What?

Kalinda

Don't do this.

Glenn Childs

Come on, Kalinda. What do you care? You're out for yourself. You've always been out for yourself. And either way, you're going to tell the truth.

Kalinda

You don't know that.

Glenn Childs

I know that the sun is coming up tomorrow, and that you are going to tell the truth on the stand. And Peter Florrick is going back to prison. End of story.

Kalinda

[about Will and Alicia] You two do have a complicated relationship. You know, an unrequited thing.

Alicia

What does that even mean? An unrequited thing?

Kalinda

Look, I don't really deal well with all this high school stuff.

Alicia

And wouldn't that make him want me on the case, not off it?

Kalinda

I don't know. Alicia, complicated relationships are a breeding ground for misinterpreted action.

Will

Please, tell me you have something good.

Kalinda

Well, I'm not sure what it is. And my method for obtaining it is not exactly legitimate.

Will

Illegitimate as in "I can't use it in court", or... we can go to jail?

Kalinda

I downloaded firmware and cloned Patti Nyholm's phone, in order to intercept her text messages. [he chuckles] What? You wanted something. I got you something.

[about Kalinda who wants to open a locker] Don't you need a warrant or something?

Kalinda

Yeah, if I were a cop. I can't get bolt cutters in here, but it'd be easier if you just opened it.

So you're not a cop?

Kalinda

No.

And you're not with campus police?

Kalinda

Mm-mmm.

So who are you?

Kalinda

Kalinda.

So, you enjoy tarnishing my reputation?

Kalinda

Best part of my day.

Kalinda

The fact is, you know something about Stern no one else knows.

Alicia

I can't use it, Kalinda.

Kalinda

You can't not use it.

Alicia

It violates attorney-client privilege.

Kalinda

Only if you tell someone. So don't tell someone.

Kalinda

You're such a pushover.

Alicia

I am not. I'm responsible. [Kalinda gives her a look] No, I mean, I'm responsible for the Feds questioning him.

Kalinda

You're not responsible for everything bad in the world, Alicia.

Alicia

[she pauses] Where would they put her, the mom?

Kalinda

Broadview, McHenry detention, General population at Cook County. They make it a shell game.

Alicia

But you could find her?

Kalinda

So you're the pushover, I'm the one who actually does the work?

Kalinda

You have until Friday.

Alicia

I have...? No. I have two weeks.

Kalinda

Diane and Will are deciding between you and Cary on Friday.

Alicia

Where did you hear that?

Kalinda

Cary was going door to door with equity partners, lining up support. He heard it from your assistant. My guess is he's phoning in on accounts, loading up on receivables. How are you with Will?

Alicia

I don't know.

Kalinda

What happened?

Alicia

I don't know.

Kalinda

You do know. You just don't want to say. Did you sleep with him?

Alicia

No.

Kalinda

So that's the problem: you didn't sleep with him?

Alicia

No. We talked. We had... a moment.

Kalinda

And you shut it down?

Alicia

He did, too.

Kalinda

Okay. You have three problems. Cary's a good finisher. He got a head start. And Will is gonna work overtime to appear objective. Unfairly objective.

Alicia

I'm... I'm just so tired of this.

Kalinda

I know, but that's what people like Cary count on.

Alicia

Are you gay? [Kalinda doesn't answer] Oh, come on. We are talking about every single little detail of my life. It's a simple question.

Kalinda

I'm... I'm private.

Alicia

Ugh. Come on.

Kalinda

What does it matter?

Alicia

It doesn't.

Kalinda

Then why'd you want to know?

Alicia

Because I do. And how is this fair? I talk about everything.

Kalinda

I didn't say it was. You like to talk about your life. I don't like to talk about mine.

Kalinda

I phone Will, I tell him we're in a bar and that you're too drunk to go home. So you're getting a hotel room upstairs. Alicia, one night... no repercussions.

Alicia

And tomorrow?

Kalinda

Tomorrow you wake up.

Alicia

That's just not me, Kalinda.

Kalinda

Everything is you. Everything you want to be you is you.

Diane

What do you know about Derrick Bond?

Kalinda

What do I know? Well, I did the due diligence. Everything I found, you have.

Diane

What about Derrick Bond and Will?

Kalinda

Sorry?

Diane

As far as I knew, there was no connection between them. I was the connection to Derrick.

Kalinda

You're suggesting there's a link that you don't know about.

Diane

I'm suggesting I'd like to be disabused of that notion.

Kalinda

Then, I'll get to disabusing.

Kalinda

Your office is... small.

Cary

Yes. Small, but pure.

Kalinda

So, in the third year, do you get a window?

Will

I've got your back, Kalinda. Just make sure you got mine.

Kalinda

I always have... and I always will.

Cary

Good job. I didn't see that one coming.

Kalinda

Ah, I have to keep you on your toes. So, anything new on Blake?

Cary

You just got my only eyewitness kicked and you want my help?

Yeah.