[Mock advertisement, featuring gameplay footage, over the top production and a heavily tattooed James Rolfe wearing sunglasses, acting as a trucker]
Hey, kids! Strap yourself in for some action packed racing!
It's Big Rigs!
Eighteen wheels of thunder, and we've got trucks! Yeah... trucks!
Big Rigs!
Off-road traction! More power for non-stop driving action!
Big Rigs!
Over the Road Racing! Under the road, over the road, who knows?
Big Rigs!
Never lose a race again, You're always winner!
With Big Rigs!
Engines equipped with quantum phasing molecular mechanics to pass through solid objects so as to not interrupt the racing experience! Nothing stands in your way!
When you're Big Rigs!
Rear spinning tires with warp-drive velocity for interdimensional exploring! Leave the game behind and exceed the boundaries of existence!
Big motherFUCKin' Riiiiiiggs!
Drivin' around in fuckin' trucks!
BIIIIIIIIG MOOTHHHERRRRRFUCCCCKIN' RIIIIIIIIIIIIIGGGS!!! Big Rigs.
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