Computer, run EMH program "Photons Be Free."
[Computer runs program.]
Welcome. You've made an excellent choice. You're obviously a person with impeccable taste.
Computer, freeze program!
Unable to comply.
You are about to embark... on a remarkable journey. You will take on the role of a medical assistant aboard the Starship: Voyeur.
Voyeur?!
Your job will be to assist the chief medical officer and learn to tolerate his overbearing behaivor and obnoxious bedside manner. Remember! Patience is a virtue!
[Hologram disappears and the Sick Bay setting appears]
Chapter 1: It's the Doctor's World, You're Just Living In It.
When I tell you your shift begins at 0800, that doesn't mean you can stroll in here at 0800 and 24 seconds. DO YOU UNDERSTAND ME, ENSIGN?
This is outrageous.
What's outrageous, is that I'm going to miss my tee time. Now come along.
[Both doctors head over to a character that looks like Seven of Nine.]
Aww, what seems to be the trouble, One of Three?
I'm Two of Three.
Uh-huh, sorry. [looks over at Doctor] They're triplets, ya'know.
It hurts when I do this. [moves shoulders in a circle]
Well then don't do it. [laughs and pats Two of Three on the shoulder]
Ow!
Oh, don't be a baby. [picks up a medical tricorder and moves it up and down extremely fast]
Ah, your bi-radial clamp is out of alignment. I got just the thing. [picks up a hypospray and looks at the Doctor] It's a Klingon aphrodisiac. My own special blend. [Injects Two of Three with it and begins massaging her]
You'll be feeling better in no time at all. [Two of Three giggles as the Doctor watches appalled]
More from this episode
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