A character in Slings and Arrows
Played by Paul Gross
Slings and Arrows · 45 quotes
Most-quoted character in Slings and Arrows: in 18 of its 45 quotes
Most scenes with: Richard Smith-Jones (2), Oliver Welles (2)
[Trying to explain Oliver's will]
Geoffrey TennantI assure you I don't want to do anything weird with the head. As a matter of fact it was Oliver himself who requested that his flesh be removed, and that his skull be used in all future productions of Hamlet. So, you see, it's not weird, and, in fact, it is notarized.
[Geoffrey is announcing that he is going to take over production of Hamlet.]
Geoffrey TennantMy reason may very well be hanging by a thread. Well, my friends, it is my belief that the best things happen just before the thread snaps.
Geoffrey TennantI would've cut my throat, but you're not allowed to do that in front of subscribers.
GeoffreyYou stay in the theater because you don't wanna starve to death? Now that is irony.
[Geoffrey is preparing a nervous Jack for his first performance as Hamlet.]
GeoffreyWell, forget about perfection! There's nothing more boring than perfection! Imprecision. Fear. This is what gets them to their feet.
GeoffreyI wanted to throttle a swan. It...seemed sensible at the time.
Geoffrey TennantI don't believe this! Oliver Welles is dead! I poured him in the river and swans ate him! What do I have to do to get this man out of my life?
Geoffrey[after announcing the new season] There will be struggle. There will be sacrifice. There will be tears, there will be the occasional fistfight. And in the end, there will be transformation.
Go for it, man.
Geoffrey Tennant“Go for it, man!” These are the words a director likes to hear.
[Geoffrey is being evicted from his theater after not paying rent.]
No! I do not want any trouble! You are crazy! Please.
He’s not crazy.
GeoffreyNot anymore.
You attacked me with a knife!
GeoffreyOh, that was a prop.
[holding Oliver's skull] It's not that heavy at all!
Geoffrey TennantIt's much lighter without the ego.
[Geoffrey is in jail after engaging a rival director in a duel.]
Are you a suicide risk?
Geoffrey TennantIsn't everybody?
Is something bothering you?
Geoffrey TennantThey want me to do Macbeth.
Damn it!
Geoffrey TennantWhy does that bother you?
I do not like that play. It teaches us nothing.
Geoffrey TennantIt teaches us about evil.
No! It shows us evil, it's a portrait of a psychopath. Where I come from in Nigeria it is a familiar sight, I've had my fill of psychopaths.
Geoffrey TennantThere's not enough fear here. Actors should be frightened for their lives. That's when they do their best work.
Really?!
GeoffreyMm-hmm.
That's just like normal people!
GeoffreyMm-hmm!
GeoffreyLook, if this is about Henry...what's done is done. And it's better this way. Jerry knows all the lines. He'll be fine.
Geoffrey, the only reason that we're selling any tickets at all is because of Henry Breedlove.
GeoffreyHe is defying my direction, he's in another play entirely, and he's infected the whole cast. Now I know you're worried about your job—
Geoffrey, I am worried about the future of the entire festival. Now: what is the point of putting on a play if no one comes to see it?
GeoffreyWhich would you prefer: an empty house with a great play, or a full house with a piece of garbage?
GARBAGE! GARBAGE! I want GARBAGE!
These quotes come from Wikiquote's Slings and Arrows pages and are available under the Creative Commons Attribution-ShareAlike License.
