[singing]
Be a winner
at the game of Life!
[A pink teenage girl peg is shown listening to music in her bedroom; then her mother comes in with an envelope that says: "COLLEGE."]
A letter from the admissions' office? My life starts now!
[The space wheel spins off-screen; then the mother peg opens the envelope to take out a rejection letter.]
[disappointed] Rejected?! Fiddlesticks! [they both hang their heads]
[singing]
Disappointment in
the game of Life!
[The next shot of the girl peg working in a fast-food restaurant, having just dropped several meat patties from a tray onto the floor; a blue man peg [another worker] scolds her for this.]
That's the last tray of imitation meat patties you'll ruin. You're fired.
Isn't there anything I can do to save my job? [space wheel spins again]
Yes, there is.
[The pegs walk into the kitchen to have sex, both moaning as this occurs.]
Oh, yeah!
Oh, I really... need... this... job!
Work it! You're keepin' your job!
[singing]
Sex for favors
in the game of Life!
[We cut to the pink peg as she takes a pregnancy test in a restroom.]
[praying] God, please, please.
[The space wheel spins again, changes the minus sign on the thermometer into a plus one, and despairs the peg.]
Nooo! [crying] Oh, God, why?!
[singing]
Broken condoms
in the game of Life!
[The next scene is of the pink peg giving birth as a blue doctor peg looks at where the newborns will come out; her husband [the fast-food worker] urges her as this happens.]
Come on, honey, just one more big push!
[As the pink peg screams in pain, the wheel spins once more, making her give birth to four pink peg daughters.]
[excited] Aw, shoot!
[singing]
Start a family
in the game of Life!
[The last scene is of the new family's home, where their daughters stand near the fridge as their father drinks from a beer bottle; his wife complains about his drinking.]
God, another interview you've blown? We can't all live on beer, you know!
[But the blue peg, having had enough of his wife's objections, starts to whack her repeatedly with the bottle, making the girls cower in fear, while one of them just shakes her head in disappointment/embarrassed/shame]
You ought to...shut...your...
[wailing] Stop!
...big...mouth...
Please, stop!
...once...
Don't hit me!
...and...for...all..stupid...
[in tears] I'm sorry!
...bitch!
[The space wheel spins one last time; then the pink peg shoots her husband to death with a pistol, pouring out his blood.)
[singing now sounding panicked]
Kill your husband
in the game of Life!
[The police arrive at the house, making the kids huddle in fright.]
[Bleep] spinner....
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