I'm Lots-a-Laughs Bear. and I've gathered y'all here today for a special, happy celebration. [Laughs so hardly]
If it's a special, happy celebration. then why am I crapping a load in my drawers?
[Laugh-a-Lot Bear unveils a cannon which she fires at the care bear animals, killing them all and destroying part of the front hotel.]
We did it!! We killed all the Care Bear cousins!
Hooray for murder!
Now let us celebrate our genocide! Get your party on!
Whooo!!! Everyone eat some rainbow!
Mmmm...that's good rainbow. [sky darkens and lightning flashes] Jesus [bleep]ing Christ! It's the great Cloud Keeper in the sky!
Care Bears! I have watched your actions with great displeasure!
But, we purified the land of Care-a-Lot!
For your dark and terrible deeds, I shall turn Care-a-Lot into a dark and terrible place. A hell on Earth; I shall turn Care-a-Lot into... [lightning] ...New Jersey!
[Transformation begins care bears started screaming, rainstorm, and cuts to a mayors desk]
Hello. I'm New Jersey's Governor John Corzine. I hope you've enjoyed this reenactment of our state's proud history: The Garden State. [eats some rainbow] Come get in on some of this rainbow.
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