TV show quotes
[The next day, Zane is leading his team to the fortress]
I don't even think Zane knows where he's going. [to Zane] Uh, tell us again how you stumbled upon Lloyd's secret headquarters?
I followed a bird.
Why did you follow a bird?
Because it danced.
Oh... okay. Was it a cuckoo bird? [he, Kai and Cole laugh] The bird.
Of course not. Everyone knows cuckoo birds are not indigenous to these forests.
[When the ninja return to the Monastery, they see it burnt down, covered in flames]
We're too late. Those snakes.
[The Dragons cry for help]
Rocky!
[He quickly releases the Dragons for them to gain some fresh air]
Our home.
Shard! Put this out!
[Shard freezes the flames]
The training equipment, gone.
Our video games, gone!
They stole their staff back.
What do we do now?
[Kai's sadness turns to anger as he turns to Zane]
If you hadn't followed that silly bird, none of this would've happened!
Kai…
No, Sensei, he's right! [to Zane; sharply] Because of you, my high score has been deleted!
This is a teaching moment. We must learn from this.
A teaching moment?! What's wrong with you?! Don't you get it?! EVERYTHING IS GONE!
Enough! [Kai, Cole and Jay turn to look at him] We're all at fault. Zane is your brother. Apologize at once.
[On the Destiny's Bounty, the ninja are sleeping]
[banging a gong, waking the ninja up] Evil doesn't sleep and neither should you! [the ninja groan as they wake up] In order to reach your full potential, we must greet each day as an opportunity.
[gets up] Okay, okay, we're up. But if you want us to reach full potential, shouldn't we at least get a full night of rest?
You call that a rest? I think my back has more lumps than the mattress.
We were up so late, talking about how cool it is to have a new headquarters, I guess we lost track of time. Since the Serpentine burned down our monastery, I'm just glad we have a roof over our head.
What is our lesson today, Sensei? Mastering the strike of the Scorpion? Or perhaps the grace of— [the ground breaks and he coughs]
I think today's lesson would be chores.
Chores?!
Ninja fight, Sensei. They do not clean.
In order to respect ourselves, we must respect our new home and where we are from. And this place is a long way from becoming a ninja headquarters. I expect things to be spotless when I return. And put your backs into it.
Looks like we're about have some visitors, and loud ones at that.
[sighs] Ugh, it's my parents. Please, if they start yapping, just don't get them going, okay? They don't know when to quit. And if you start talking, then they'll start talking, and suddenly half the day is gone before you know it ends-
We get it! They talk a lot! [mutters] The cherry doesn't fall far from its blossom.
[he and Edna leave] Bye, son. I couldn't be more proud.
And bring Nya with you, will ya? I can see why you like her.
Mom…!
Now that they have left, perhaps Jay can teach us the art of… kissing pillows. [snickers]
[embarrassed] Argh!
[Everyone else laughs]
[Zane wakes up, hitting his head on the top bunk of the bed]
Oh, sleeping in. You're gonna be late for training.
Oh, how come no one awakened me?
We didn't think you wanted us to. You looked like you were having some dream.
How do I know this isn't a dream—
[hits Zane in the face with a pillow] Does that feel like a dream?
No. Thank you for your help.
[The others laugh]
What was so important to ignore my teachings?
Uh, nothing.
It was nothing, Sensei.
Yeah, we don't talk while you teach.
Everyone was paying attention.
Since you all appear to be lacking in focus, then you can all share in the punishment.
What?
Punishment?
It was all Zane.
I was merely answering their questions.
No free time and no video games. The rest of the day can be used for training. And tomorrow, for that matter.
Training? For how long?
Until you can answer this simple riddle: what is the best way to defeat an enemy?
Easy, with a sword.
Your fists.
Spinjitzu.
Tornado of Creation?
[sighs] Pace yourselves. You have a lot of training ahead of you. Make sure you sharpen your mind as well as your Spinjitzu. [walks away]
Ugh. What's the best way to defeat an enemy? It could be anything, ugh!
Come on, guys, we're smart. We can figure this out.
Yeah, but let's hear more about this dream.
Let me just say, the Green Ninja is awesome.
[On the Bounty, the ninja tell Wu they solved his riddle]
Oh. You must have found the answer to what is the best way to defeat an enemy.
We have, Sensei. It's— On three, guys. One, two...
Teamwork!
Is this what you all think?
Yeah.
Yes!
Absolutely.
Sadly, you are all wrong.
Come on.
[Kai groans]
Aw, man.
I'm starting to think whoever figures out this riddle can be the Green Ninja for all I care.
Why are you not still training? Did you find the answer to the riddle?
[sighs] No, Sensei. We still don't know what the best way to defeat your enemy is.
It is to make them your friend.
Oh.
[to Cole] You couldn't just be happy with the top score, you had to rub it in my face!
[to Jay] Do you know how long it took me to make that?! Three days. Three days!
[to Zane] It's an unsaid law, okay? You don't touch a man's robot!
[to Kai] How am I supposed to strike fear in this? [shows that his ninja suit has dyed pink] IT'S PINK!
[As the ninja argue with each other, Wu enters, sees them and opens the bathroom door to reveal Lloyd; He laughs sinisterly. The ninja stop arguing and see some spices, tools and detergent]
[gasp] You did this?!
Boys, I get first dibs on…
No dibs. I put him up to this for today's lesson. I wanted to show you the destructive power of rumors and that jumping to conclusions can only lead to trouble. Did you ever think to find out if the accusations were true?
Uh, no offense, Sensei, but let me jump to this conclusion: today's lesson is lame.
Yeah, why can't you just teach us to paralyze your enemy with one finger, or find out if a man is lying by the twitch of his nose?
Because not all lessons are about fighting! And I… misplaced my lesson book.
[Kai sees a book sticking out of Lloyd's back pocket and takes it]
You mean this lesson book?
It was the perfect plan, until you had to show up and mess everything up and-
[Cole closes the door on him]
[over the speaker] If you're done fooling around, I could use you guys on the bridge. We do still have a snake problem to attend to. Over and out!
It's one thing to let the son of your nemesis live with you, but having my sister here? I mean, come on! I thought this was a NINJA headquarters!
You do know I can hear you. Over and out!
You know, whether it was in a lesson book or not, we used the destructive power of rumors to our advantage.
And now the Serpentine are further away than ever from getting their act together.
You know, I don't think we would've gotten out of there if it hadn't been for Zane.
Don't thank me, thank Lloyd. If it hadn't been for his "laundry skills," we all would've been found.
[Everyone laughs. Lloyd comes in with Zane's ninja suit, which is now white again]
Well, it took me twenty loads, but your suit's no longer pink. [to Cole] And to show that I'm sorry, Cole, I got you a can of nuts.
Uh, haha, yeah. Don't think I don't see what this is. When I open this, a bunch of snakes are gonna pop out, right? Yeah, no thank you.
[Cole opens the fridge, only for fake snakes to pop out at him. Everyone laughs]
First, I'll stomp on his tail. Then when he turns, a thunder clap to his ears. Then when he's stunned, I'll disarm him.
Too late, he's already hypnotized you and now you're under his control.
Or he's already put you in a squeeze.
Or spit on you with his hallucinatory venom. Trust me, bad stuff.
[groans] Uncle, what's the best way to stun a Serpentine if you don't know what kind they are?
Sadly, it was the Sacred Flute you four carelessly lost.
Hey, no, no, no, we didn't lose it, Pythor stole it.
Whatever the case, without it, I fear we have nothing to combat their powers. We may have prevented them from uniting in the past, but they will try again, and one day they will be stronger.
Don't worry, Sensei. I've almost reached my Full Potential, and when I become the Green Ninja, we're not gonna need any magic flute.
You're gonna be the Green Ninja? Hahaha, don't make me laugh.
I thought it was decided that I was destined to become the Green Ninja.
Oh, the only thing decided about you, Zane, is that you're weird.
[The ninja start arguing]
Yeah, yeah, yeah. What's in the box?
Your new uniforms.
[The ninja stop arguing and gasp in excitement at seeing their new suits]
Whoa! They've got, like, armor!
I love the gold highlights!
Battle claws!
The material is really light and breathable.
[upset] Oh, nothing for me?
Um, you get, uh, the box.
[sees the Samurai] Huh? The Samurai?
[The Samurai crashes, and Kai runs after him]
Testing. Testing? One, two...
[The Samurai takes the helmet off, revealing Nya]
[surprised] Nya?
[puts the helmet back on] Steer clear, ninja! Don't look... [takes the helmet off] ...at me.
I don't understand. You're the Samurai?
It was always a boys' club. You never let me try to help, so I found my own way to be a hero. Are you mad?
Mad? Of course not. It's just, all this time, I've been trying to protect you and you've never needed it. You're amazing.
[lightly punches Kai's arm] Girl power. You're not gonna tell the others, are you?
But we had a bet. We said whoever caught the Samurai would be the Green— [sighs] Of course I won't say anything. How'd you make all this stuff?
You'd be surprised how much spare time I have waiting for you guys to come back from your missions. You better head back before anyone gets suspicious. We'll have to rescue Lloyd another day.
[She gives him the weapons]
Nya, whenever I get in trouble, the other three always have my back. But you...just be careful, will you?
Promise.
[finds out that he's a robot] No! It can’t be! NO! NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Zane, what's wrong?
Are you hurt?
You okay? [Zane sighs and looks at the blueprint] Hey, what...
[Zane opens his chest to reveal a control panel, making the others scream in shock]
You're... a robot?!
All this time, and I never knew.
Uh, guess this explains why you're always acting so weird. Right?
The reason I never had a sense of humor was because my funny switch wasn't on. [turns on his funny switch and starts dancing and singing] Hello, my baby, hello, my honey, hello, my ragtime gal, send me a kiss by wire.
[Jay laughs as Zane turns off his funny switch and sighs sadly]
Uh, it just makes you more special. You're still the same Zane. Just more, uh… gears.
No matter what you're made of, you're still our brother.
Really?
In fact, I bet it even makes you an even better ninja.
Yeah, and how cool is it that I can honestly say "My brother is a Nindroid"?
A Nindroid?
These quotes come from Wikiquote's Ninjago pages and are available under the Creative Commons Attribution-ShareAlike License.
