Seymour Birkhoff quotes from Nikita

Birkhoff

[in the middle of a coffee shop] BOW DOWN BEFORE SHADOWWALKER!

Birkhoff

[to Ryan] Dude, I never knew facts could be a superpower before you.

Birkhoff

Ugh, I can't look at another tree. This must be what squirrels feel like.

Birkhoff

She had a good run. Won't be another one like her.

Percy

Don't be so sure.

Birkhoff

Niki, you're insane.

Nikita

Don't call me Niki.

Birkhoff

Then don't call me nerd. Remember you used to call me that? "Patch me through to Michael, nerd. This computer's busted, fix it, nerd. Place ain't the same without you."

Percy

[about Nikita] Did she say who she was working for?

Birkhoff

No. Honestly, I think it's a bluff. I think she's on her own. I mean, you should have seen her, she was a wreck. I was able to turn the tables on her easy.

Michael

Yeah, was that before or after she duct-taped you to that springy rocking horse?

Percy

What we do know is that she's been ahead of us at each step. At a certain point we have to consider the possibility of a leak from the inside...a high level leak.

Michael

I'd like to rule out a data breach before we start the mole hunt.

Birkhoff

Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa. Data breach? No way. No. Our network is Fort Knox. Internal servers are air-gapped and I run routine PAN tests on the outer defenses. We're talking five-tier security with protocols that rotate every hour, on the hour. That's proprietary software. Only person who could dream of hacking into Division is me. [The two men stare at Birkhoff] What?

Amanda

Did you ever have feelings for her? If you have an emotional connection to Nikita, it's perfectly natural. Coworkers often develop physical and emotional attractions for one another.

Birkhoff

She was a recruit. A super hot one, yeah. But I know the rules. Look, but don't touch.

Amanda

She's not a recruit anymore.

Alex

Pretty cool how you can hack into all these servers. Local theatres, local police...FBI?

Birkhoff

It's called "ownage," girl. I don't have to hack jack. All these systems are already hacked. I own them. One button. Boom. Sneakers. River Phoenix. Rent it. What's up?

Alex

Division's lucky to have you.

Birkhoff

Heh. Tell that to Percy and the Dragon Queen. They thought I was a mole. Fascists.

Michael

OK, so where is this place?

Birkhoff

The quarters for the Red Circle Triad in New York. Not much going on right now but at night it turns into a pretty happening spot. Lady Gaga was there last Friday.

Birkhoff

Oh, holy night.

Percy

Relax, they're rent-a-cops.

Birkhoff

No, it's Nikita.

Percy

Detonate the vest. Now.

Michael

Not everything has to be a video game.

Birkhoff

You have an attachment to things from the past. Or, things that have... Passed on. It's OK to miss her, you know. Nikki was... One in a million. A force of nature. Like a one-woman Michael Bay movie, only with good acting.

Michael

You miss her, huh?

Birkhoff

I mean, don't you?

Michael

Her death hasn't been confirmed yet.

Birkhoff

Well, if she was still alive, why haven't we heard from her in the past 2 weeks? Denial is the first stage of grief, my brother. The last? Acceptance. I guess I've accepted it. Maybe you should, too.

Michael

What's going on?

Birkhoff

Oh, nothing. Just confirming our girl's got 9,000 lives.

Michael

Our girl?

Percy

Nikita.

Birkhoff

Percy trusts me.

Nikita

But will he trust you when you come back with another microchip in your tooth; or teeth? You have 5 minutes to decide, or prepare for oral surgery.

Michael

She hasn't checked in, something might have gone wrong with that op.

Birkhoff

Or something went right with the date, shazam! Dude, you really need to get a sense of humor.

Michael

I don't laugh at your jokes because I have a sense of humor.