If you take that into consideration, then perhaps this world isn't that bad.
ShinjiStill, the reality itself might not be bad, but I could still hate myself.
HHyuga
But it's your mind which takes reality and separates it into what's bad and hateful.
AAoba
It's only the mind which separates reality from truth.
MMaya
Any new position from which you view your reality will change your perception of its nature. It's all literally a matter of perspective.
KKaji
There are as many truths as there are people.
But there is only one truth that is your truth. That's the one that's formed by whatever point of view that you chose to view it from. It's a revised perception that protects you.
That's true. And one can have a perspective that's far too small.
HHikari
However, a person can only see things from the perspective that they chose to see them from.
One must learn to judge things via the perceived truths that one receives from others.
For example, sunny days make you feel good.
Rainy days make you feel gloomy.
If you are told this is so, then that is what you believe is so.
But you can have fun on a rainy day as well!
FFuyutsuki
Your truth can be changed simply by the way you accept it. That's how fragile the truth for a human is.
KKaji
A person's truth is so simple, that most ignore it to concentrate on what they think are deeper truths.
You, for example, are simply unused to what it is to be liked by others.
You've never learned how to deal with fearing what others feel about you and so you avoid it.
Shinji
But, don't the others hate me?
What are you, stupid? Haven't you realized it's all in your imagination, you megadork!
Shinji
But, I hate myself.
One who truly hates himself cannot love, he cannot place his trust in another.
Shinji
I'm a coward. I'm cowardly, sneaky and weak.
No, only if you think you are, but if you know yourself, you can take care of yourself.
Shinji
[introspectively] I hate myself. But, maybe, maybe I could love myself. Maybe, my life can have a greater value. That's right! I am no more or less than myself. I am me! I want to be myself! I want to continue existing in this world! My life is worth living here!
[Shinji's room cracks open and he finds himself on a small blue globe with the cast of the series]
EEveryone
[applauding] Congratulations!
Shinji
Thank you all!
[last line of the series]
Shinji, listen to me. From now on you’re on your own. You’ll have to make your own decisions; no one can do it for you.
Shinji
I... I can’t. I’m no good. I can’t pilot Eva if all I do is hurt and kill people. I thought I had no choice but to pilot Eva, but I was just lying to myself. I’m not worthy of piloting an Eva because I don’t understand anything! I’m incapable of doing anything good for anybody else. I did something terrible to Asuka. I killed Kaworu. I’m a horrible person. I'm dishonest and a coward. All I ever do is hurt other people, so I’d rather do nothing at all!
I’m not going to feel sorry for you. If you don’t like feeling pain, then you can just sit here and let them kill you!
[Shinji begins to cry]
Crying isn’t going to solve anything, either! [pauses] You hate yourself, don’t you? That’s why you hurt others. Deep down you know that you suffer more when you cause someone else pain, than if you just let yourself get hurt. But, Shinji, that was your decision, so that makes it a valid choice. That was what you wanted, so that makes it worthwhile. Stop lying to yourself, and realize that you do have options. Then accept the choices you’ve made.
Shinji
But you're not me. You don’t know what I have to go through. You don’t understand!
So fucking what if I’m not you?! That doesn’t mean its okay for you to give up! If you do, I’ll never forgive you as long as I live. God knows I’m not perfect either. I’ve made tons of stupid mistakes and later I regretted them. And I’ve done it over and over again, thousands of times. A cycle of hollow joy and vicious self-hatred. But even so, every time I learned something about myself. Please, Shinji. You’ve got to pilot Eva and settle this once and for all. For your own sake. Find out why you came here. Why you exist at all. Answer your own questions. And when you’ve found your answers, come back to me. I’ll be waiting for you. Promise me.
Shinji
Yes.
[Misato kisses Shinji]
That was a grown-up kiss. We'll do the rest when you get back. [shoves Shinji into an elevator and collapses in a pool of blood] If I'd known it'd end like this... I would have... changed the carpet like Asuka suggested...Right, Pen Pen?... Kaji, my love... I did do the right thing... didn't I?
Shinji
Nobody understands me.
You never understood anything.
Shinji
I thought this was supposed to be a world without pain, and without uncertainty.
That's because you thought that everyone else felt the same as you do.
Shinji
You betrayed me! You betrayed my feelings!
You misunderstood from the very beginning. You just believed what you wanted to believe.
Shinji
Nobody wants me, so they can all just die.
Then what is your hand for?
Shinji
Nobody cares whether or not I exist. Nothing ever changes, so they can all just die.
Then tell me, what is your heart for?
Shinji
It would be better if I never existed. I should just die, too.
[Flashback image of Shinji as a child, abandoned and crying]
Shinji
I-is it okay for me to be here?
[White text on black: "Silence". Shinji screams]
Shinji
Hey.
Shinji
What are dreams?
[A shot of people in a movie theatre. After a few seconds, a white text, reading "Does it feel good?", appears. Afterwards, a shot of the three voice actresses for Rei, Asuka, and Misato (from left to right, respectively: Megumi Hayashibara, Yuko Miyamura, and Kotono Mitsuishi) is shown]
Shinji
I don't understand. I don't understand what reality is.
You can't bridge the gap between your own truth and the reality of others.
Shinji
I don't know where to find happiness.
So you only find happiness in your dreams.
Shinji
Then... this is not reality? This world where no one exists?
Shinji
Then I don't exist here either.
This convenient fabrication is your attempt to change reality.
Shinji
Is that wrong?
You were using fantasy to escape reality.
Shinji
Why can't I dream that I'm alone?
That is not a dream. That is a substitute for reality.
[Another shot of the theatre. A few seconds later, the scene dissolves into a shot of the same theatre, now empty]
Shinji
So where is my dream?
It is a continuation of reality.
Shinji
But where is my reality?
It is at the end of your dream.
KFKouzou Fuyutsuki
When Man created Evangelion, were we trying to create a clone of God?
Of course. Humans can only exist on this Earth. But the Evangelion will be able to exist forever, along with the human soul that dwells within it. When the Earth, the Moon and the Sun are all gone, EVA will exist, so long as one person remains. It'll be lonely, but as long as one person still lives...
KFKouzou Fuyutsuki
...it will be eternal proof that Mankind ever existed.
Shinji
Goodbye, Mother...
Neon Genesis Evangelion · 107 quotes
