Murder, She Wrote quotes

Sir John Landry: [after Jessica exposes him as the murderer] Is this where I draw the gun and say "You're never gonna take me alive"? It would be rather futile, wouldn't it?

Margo Santana: Why, John? He was your friend. He loved you.

Sir John Landry: I loved him too, Margo. But you see, Willard was not the only one who was broke. The art business is very volatile. Subject to the whims of a tasteless public. I was in grave danger of losing everything. Everything. You do see my problem, don't you?

Harry McGraw: It took a lot of guts to face me down in here, not knowing who I was.

Jessica Fletcher: Didn't take any guts at all, Mr. McGraw. While I was out, I phoned the Sheriff.

Gavin Daniels: I'm gonna tell you a secret, Jessica. I'm still in love with the woman, always will be. That's why we've enjoyed such a marvelous divorce.

Brad Lockwood: Phil died intestate.

Mavis Kreuger: How awful! I never knew that about Phil.

Brad Lockwood: Mavis, that means he didn't leave a will.

Tiffany Harrow: You know, it's too bad you're not up for an award this year, Mr. Post.

Hemsley Post: Well, even the mighty oak must let a little sunshine on the rising saplings.

Frank Lapinski: I've read a couple of your books. Lightweight but kind of fun.

Jessica Fletcher: Thank you very much. I never planned to be Dostoevsky.

Debbie Delancey: [after Jessica accuses her of committing the murder] Frank sent his novel to Post. His only copy. And then we heard later that he was coming out with his own Vietnam novel, and Frank was furious.

Jessica Fletcher: And you wanted to help Frank.

Debbie Delancey: Yes. I would do anything for him. And then it happened. A way to get the novel back. Mr. Post saw me approaching the other writers in the hotel lobby, so he came over. Somebody had said something to him about my story, and he asked me up to his hotel room after the party to discuss my future. See, I knew what he had in mind. I wasn't really sure what I was gonna do. I, you know, talk to him, or maybe just grab the manuscript and run, but, I was not prepared for what happened because ... He was like an animal.

Jessica Fletcher: He must've taken Horace's sword umbrella by mistake after the cocktail party.

Debbie Delancey: I didn't mean to kill him. It was an accident.

Jessica Fletcher: Then you took the briefcase with the manuscript and gave it to Frank?

Debbie Delancey: Yeah. He had stolen Frank's novel. Almost word for word. Look, I have to go to the police, Mrs. Fletcher. I just can't let Frank lie for me.

Jessica Fletcher: Debbie, just tell the police what happened. I think you have a strong case for self-defense.

Debbie Delancey: You believe me?

Jessica Fletcher: I do. And so will a jury, if it should come to that.

Miriam Radford: We have had to replace copies of your books a dozen times over the last couple of years. People check them out and absolutely will not return them.

Jessica Fletcher: Well, I'm very flattered. I think.

Ben Gibbons: [after Jessica exposes him as the murderer] I didn't start out to kill him. I really didn't. I just wanted him to know how much hurt he had caused. Everybody had got off the bus except Stoner and the young guy. I was working around the engine, just stalling, waiting for Stoner to be alone. He was mean, cold-mean. He said he didn't give a damn about some dumb kid that just happened to get in the way. He had done his time, and there was nothing anybody could do. "Dumb kid." The sweetest little girl you ever saw in your life. Well, all of a sudden, I just went crazy. I couldn't think about anything but killing him. When I got off the bus, I was shaking so hard, I thought I was going to pass out. I realized what I'd done. I had killed a man. I was no better than he had been. Just then, I saw the captain come out of the diner and get on the bus. I thought I was a goner. But when I looked in the window, the captain was going through Stoner's pockets. Then he grabbed the suitcase and took off. I just stood there for a few minutes. Trying to figure out what to do. That's when I knew I had to stab him in the neck with the screwdriver.

Sheriff Amos Tupper: But why?

Ben Gibbons: Guess you know the answer to that.

Jessica Fletcher: You knew the coroner would figure out that Stoner died of strangulation and not a stab wound. By confessing to killing Stoner with a screwdriver, no one would figure you were the original killer. As Mr. Downing said a few moments ago, the police would check backgrounds, prior relationships. Downing thought he'd be a key, perhaps the only suspect. You thought the only way to escape arrest for Mr. Stoner's murder was to confess it.

Dr. Gary Ellison: [after Jessica exposes the murderer] Kenyon said goodbye to Dr. Sam at the party, but he didn't leave. After everybody else was gone, he went to the den. Dr. Sam was on the phone. When he hung up, Kenyon shot him with my gun. Then he dragged the body into the entryway. He got the front door keys out of Dr. Sam's pocket and dumped the body into the pool so that the heated water would make the time of death difficult to figure out. He set the alarm and he left the house. When he got back to the hospital, we staged a fight going into the office. We played a tape with a prerecorded argument. Then I slipped out the back way. I went to Dr. Sam's house, it's only five minutes from here, and unlocked the front door. That set the alarm off. I tossed the keys inside, then fired a shot into the air. I came in the same way I left. Then I walked out of the office after Kenyon. That's it.

Jessica Fletcher: Not quite. You planted that gun in Jennie's locker after she became a suspect.

Dr. Wes Kenyon: We had to nail down the case against her. We knew the gun couldn't be traced. It was another one of those brilliant ideas from Mr. Ivy League here.

Dr. Gary Ellison: It was a good idea. Only I had to share it with an idiot like you!

Lt. Ray Jenkins: Boys, boys, boys, boys! Take it easy. Someone might get the idea that you two don't like each other.

Peggy Shannon: Forget it, Jess. I'm not ready for romance.

Jessica Fletcher: But it's been years since your divorce from Johnny!

Peggy Shannon: I survived the divorce. I'm not sure I survived the marriage.

Jessica Fletcher: So what happens next? Am I now a threat because I know the secret?

Tim Carver: Jessica, we all promised each other Mary would never find out.

Jessica Fletcher: But Carl died. Maybe not murder, but he's dead because of what you all did.

Sam Breen: All right. We'll go to the sheriff, tell him what happened, stand trial. I don't know what a jury will say. We'll even go to jail if it comes to that. But there's no way on God's green earth Mary will ever know the reason why. Not from any of us.

Jessica Fletcher: Nor from me, Sam. She's been hurt enough already.

Michael Hagarty: Well, now, what's this I've always heard about crusty New Englanders?

Jessica Fletcher: It's just a rumor started by our forefathers to keep out the tourists.