Erin Greene quotes from Midnight Mass

Erin Greene

A lot of people cross-stitch Bible verses. But my mom goes with the passage from Lamentations. It's a special kind of self pity to identify with the destruction of Jerusalem. She said, "Everyone gets their wings clipped at some point." And I asked the next question. It's the only question a kid's going to ask when they hear something like that. I said, "Mom, did you get your wings clipped?" And she said, "Yep. Oh yes. Day you were born." [pause] I ruined her life. But Littlefoot? You see, that baby saved mine. Because I did it. I did what I said I was going to do. I ran away at sixteen. I was going to be an actress. I was going to be a star. And I traveled, and I lived. And by the time I woke up and the drugs had worn off, I looked up and I had married my mother. [about her baby] She saved me. And now she's gone. And how is that possible? How is that possible?

Erin Greene

That's why they didn't sink them. That's why they just pulled some plugs. Because they need the boats. So they can leave, after. Sarah, you said it was a contagion. If just one of them, just one of them makes it to the mainland...

Erin Greene

How are you?

Riley Flynn

I don't know. That's kind of the whole thing. I don't know. I have no idea. I mean, in prison, it was easy. I had things to do, you know? Count the days. Count down the sentence. Eat, sleep, read. It's all pretty spelled out for you. Regimented. But here? Here I have nothing. What, am I going to get a job? Go to school? I have no money, no prospects. I just exist now. That's it. I have absolutely no purpose at all. I'm just sitting in my parents' house, breathing, and serving no purpose to anyone whatsoever. I'm just living. [long pause] And that's the worst part. Because I shouldn't be alive, Erin. So I don't know. What do I do here? I eat. Sleep. Shit. I don't know. Walk home now, eat dinner, wait out this fucking storm.

Erin Greene

There you go. Do that. Ride out the storm tonight. And then tomorrow, you'll see what tomorrow's all about. Find another project. I'm sorry for what you've been through. I'm really, really sorry.

Erin Greene

You found your purpose.

Riley Flynn

Yeah, cat disposal.

Erin Greene

You've got to start somewhere.

Erin Greene

How was your day?

Riley Flynn

It's been a long time since anyone asked me that.

Erin Greene

In prison, nobody asks?

Riley Flynn

No, in prison no one needs to ask. Every day is exactly the same.

Erin Greene

[on a rowboat in the bay] I've been scared by much worse, by much worse, and I don't let that happen anymore. I'm not scared, not of you, my dear, dear you. If you are sick, or if you need help, I'm not scared of that. I'd get you the help you need. I'd do that with you, without judgement and without fear. Just tell me what you need. Tell me why we're out here. Tell me what you want.

Riley Flynn

I didn't bring you out here to scare you, or to isolate you. I brought you out here so I'd have nowhere to go. I'm not as strong as you; I never was. What do I want? I want you to take this boat and row to the mainland and leave this place, and never look back. But I knew you wouldn't do that. And I knew you wouldn't believe any of this unless you saw. I want you to run. But I believe you're gonna row back there and do everything you can to try and save them. I'm just so sorry you have to see this. [pause] I love you Erin Greene. I've loved you my whole life. One way or another.

Erin Greene

I love you too.

Riley Flynn

I did my best. I did my best.

Annie Flynn

Never made much sense to me. We all say there's a heaven. And it's waiting for us. Then we claw, fight, beg for a few minutes at the end. Minutes.

Erin Greene

It isn't about us anymore. It's about everyone else in the world. Dying for people we haven't even met. No greater love than that. What the Good Book says, isn't it?

Riley Flynn

[as Erin is being killed by the angel] So what do you think happens when we die, Erin?

Erin Greene

Speaking for myself?

Riley Flynn

Speaking for yourself.

Erin Greene

Myself. My self. That's the problem. That's the whole problem with the whole thing. That word, "self." That's not the word. That's not right. That isn't... That isn't. How did I forget that? When did I forget that? [pause] The body stops a cell at a time, but the brain keeps firing those neurons. Little lightning bolts, like fireworks inside, and I thought I'd despair, or feel afraid, but I don't feel any of that. None of it. Because I'm too busy. I'm too busy in this moment, remembering. Of course. And I remember every atom in my body was forged in a star. This matter, this body, is mostly just empty space, after all. And solid matter? It's just energy vibrating very slowly, and there is no me. There never was. The electrons of my body mingle and dance with the electrons of the ground below me and the air I'm no longer breathing. And I remember there is no point where any of that ends and I begin. I remember I am energy. Not memory. Not self. My name, my personality, my choices, all came after me. I was before them, and I will be after, and everything else is pictures picked up along the way. Fleeting little dreamlets printed on the tissue of my dying brain. And I am the lightning that jumps between. I am the energy firing the neurons, and... I'm returning. Just by remembering, I'm returning home. And it's like a drop of water falling back into the ocean, of which it's always been a part. All things... a part. All of us... a part. You, me, and my little girl, and my mother and my father, everyone who's ever been, every plant, every animal, every atom, every star, every galaxy, all of it. More galaxies in the universe than grains of sand on the beach. And that's what we're talking about when we say "God." The one. The cosmos and its infinite dreams. We are the cosmos dreaming of itself. It's simply a dream that I think is my life, every time. But I'll forget this. I always do. I always forget my dreams. But now, in this split-second, in the moment I remember, the instant I remember, I comprehend everything at once. There is no time. There is no death. Life is a dream. It's a wish. Made again, and again, and again, and again, and again, and again, and on into eternity. And I am all of it. I am everything. I am all. I am that I am.