Dr. Gibbons in “Unfinished Business”

Gentlemen, the ego of the bass player is fragile. His emotional insecurity is triggered by the perception that he is unloved, inadequate, and worthless. Just look at William Murderface. Frightened, scared, hate-filled—the perfect specimen of devolution—cro-magnon brow, distended jaw, clammy hands, buckled stomach, back pimplage, hitchhiker thumbs, hammer-assed, fallen arches, chicken-plucked legs, sandpapery, eczema-styled skin, dry, unkempt triangle hair. This creature...devolved...whirling in that mess of self-hatred bubbling inside. This pathetic insecurity will cause him to want to be in control, of course this will be overridden by his dominant laziness, lack of concentration, and possible bipolar disorder, which should make for a most disastrous NASCAR-type theatrical hybrid event.