Victor Salazar quotes from Love, Victor

Victor

Dear, Simon. I know it's been a minute since I reached out. And you were probably thinking, "Wow! I bet Victor finally has his shit together." But, Simon, my shit is not together. My shit is- Well, it's shit. Benji wants to take a break from us. We've been far from perfect, but, I thought we were strong enough to get through anything. But now- I'm not so sure.

Nice shoes. Vintage Nike Cortez's.

Victor

Yeah! Yeah, my Mom got 'em at a garage sale 'cause they were my size, she didn't know how cool they were. Not- not saying my shoes are cool.

No, they are. It sounds like those shoes are your destiny. If you believe in that kind of thing.

Victor Salazar

Yeah. Yeah, I do. Believe in... cool kicks.

Well, it was really nice meeting you...

Victor Salazar

Victor.

Benji.

Benji's chill. Also, he's gay, just so you know. I mean, I don't care, but you don't want people to get the wrong idea.

Victor Salazar

Yeah. Totally.

Isabel Salazar

What was going on in there? We did not raise you to behave like that, it's disgraceful!

Victor

I'm disgraceful? I'm not the one having an affair behind dad's back! You cheated on Dad with his boss! Does he know?

[catching up] Victor! I know. I know, she told me everything, and it wasn't easy, but she was honest.

Victor

Honest? She got with your boss, and you think she's honest?

Victor, we are not doing this here. Not in front of your little brother, so just, get in the car. Victor, get in the car. [Victor goes to the car; Armando calls to Pilar & Adrian] Alright, let's go, now!

If I can have sex with girls, anybody can.

Victor Salazar

Wait you - - But you're...

Gay? I know. This was back when I was figuring things out. Turns out human sexuality is less of a straight line, and more of a Cirque du Soleil show. Long, confusing, and full of sexy clowns.

Victor

Hey- I could've come to yours.

Oh, no, my Mom's a really light sleeper. So what's up?

Victor

I don't know how to say this, but I know if I don't say it now, I'm gonna lose my nerve, so, um- here goes.

Seriously? [turns around]

Victor

I'm sorry, it's just too much pressure with you staring at me.

What are you talking about? I blink a normal amount!

Victor

Felix, uh, I- like guys. Like, I'm into them. I thought I might for a while but I wasn't totally sure. I really wanted to make things work with Mia, because she's awesome. But I can't. Because- I like guys.

Can I turn around now?

Victor

Yeah.

I, um- I really don't know the perfect thing to say. But I'm really happy you told me. And this doesn't change anything between us, obviously.

Victor

Actually, as far as perfect things to say go, that was pretty good. Still- crying, huh?

I'm not crying! You made me aware of my blinking. Irritated my eye. So. How does it feel to get all of this off your chest?

Victor

Kind of amazing. But you were the easy one.

Yeah. Telling Mia's gonna suck. But she'll understand. It's not like you cheated on her, or killed her cat.

Victor

I kind of... kissed Benji.

Woah.

Isabel Salazar

Victor, what were you gonna say?

Victor Salazar

Nothing. [goes to leave, hesitates, then turns back] No. Not nothing. I'm gay.

I love you.

I'm sorry, I don't- what about Mia?

Victor Salazar

Well, I uh- I thought that if I could make it work with any girl, it would be Mia. But I was wrong.

How did you... I mean... When did you- decide this?

Victor Salazar

I didn't decide it, I just am it. Mom, could you please say something?

Isabel Salazar

I think... we should all get some rest. We can talk about it tomorrow.

I'm so sorry. Are you okay?

Victor Salazar

Yeah. Yeah, I'm fine. I'm sure they just... need some time.

Benji

Good to see you, Mrs. Salazar, I've heard so much about your famous chicken! [pauses awkwardly] ...And, a lot of other great things, of course.

Isabel Salazar

Thank you, Benji. Uh, listen guys, I don't know what happened, but I went to check on the chicken, and the stove must be broken or something- it was just, totally, burnt, like, chicken ash. So- why don't you guys go out? Get some pizza, on me.

Victor

Why don't we just order delivery?

Isabel Salazar

I- did not think of that. That sounds- good.

Victor

Great.

Victor

Mom, what're you- get out! Get out!

Benji

Victor, it's okay.

Victor

Benji, just- put your clothes on.

Victor

Mom- Mom.

Isabel Salazar

What were you thinking?! Your little brother is asleep in the next room!

Victor

I wasn't thinking. Okay? It just-

I'm trying so hard to wrap my head around all of this and you-

Victor

I'm sorry! It just-

Isabel Salazar

It just what? What excuse could you possibly have for doing that in my house?

Benji

What do you mean by "that"?

Isabel Salazar

I mean having sex with Adrian in the next room.

Benji

Oh, sex, or gay sex?

Victor

Stop!

Benji

Look, that was awkward for all of us, but we're in a serious relationship! She wouldn't be acting like this if she'd caught you having sex with a girl.

Why is everyone yelling?

Isabel Salazar

It's nothing, mijo, Victor just knows he's not supposed to have friends over without asking.

Benji

He's not my friend! He's my boyfriend!

Victor

[stunned at being outed to Adrian] Benji!

Benji's your boyfriend?

Isabel Salazar

You need to go.

Victor

...Just go.

Benji

Why does- Rahim hope that I'm okay?

Victor

I just- needed someone to confide in. I told him we had a fight.

Benji

Did you tell him about my drinking? [Victor hesitates; Benji grimaces and closes his eyes] Jesus, Victor.

Victor

I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I know I shouldn't have told him, but- he's not gonna say anything to anyone! I can trust him!

Benji

But I can't trust you. [silence] I think we need to take a break.

So- I told off a priest. Well, "told off" might be a bit strong, but- I did tell Father Lawrence that we're quitting the church. And, I found another congregation, in Five Points. Their website says "All are welcome," which is Catholic for "less homophobic."

Victor

Great.

Victor, is everything okay?

Victor

No.

Is it something you want to talk about?

Victor

Not really.