Jimmy Earl Dean quotes from Justified

You're very funny. That's good stuff.

Is this gonna be your new line? How we got the same sense of humor? What's in your mind? How do you think this is gonna go? You thinking, "maybe we'll fight a little, then it'll turn to wrestling and tickling and laughing, then she'll say, 'ooh, don't touch me there,' and then she won't stop me"? Is that how it runs in your head? You don't even know what to say now, do you? Even me talking about wrestling and tickling and "ooh, don't touch me there," it's like a spell's been cast, and you won't break it. Well, maybe you're just dreaming and you don't wanna wake up. [Loretta slaps Dean hard across the face] Well, wake up!

Raylan Givens

Woah woah, okay. I'm just gonna ask you one question. Do you know how a firearm works?

What?

Raylan Givens

The key word in firearm is "fire." When the pin hits the cap, makes the charge explode, meaning there's a spark, which should be of some concern to a man soaked in gasoline.

That's bullshit. That spark's too far away from the gasoline.

Raylan Givens

You didn't finish school, did you, Mr. Dean? It's not the liquid that burns. It's the fumes. Now, look. Now look, normally I would have just shot you myself the second you pulled, but I am doing my level best to avoid the paper work and the self-recrimination that comes with it, though Lord knows that you are the kind that makes it worth it more. Come on, Jimmy, can't we just try to end this without you turning yourself into the Human Torch?

Raylan Givens

Earl? You really need me to run down all the "or elses"?

Actually, I was hoping you'd try grabbing my prick again, see if it goes the same way now I'm paying attention.

Raylan Givens

I ain't gonna grab it. I'm just gonna shoot it off. You understand me, Earl? I'm gonna shoot your dick off.