Newscaster and Frank in “Gun Fever Too: Still Hot”

Good morning, Philadelphia. With us today is Frank Reynolds - local business owner, and a man with a harrowing story.

Frank

That's right. A few days ago, three thugs tried to mug me. Now, I want to be very clear about something. (eats a sandwich)

Um, Mr-

Frank

These pieces of garbage, they don't know who the hell they're dealing with.

Mr. Reynolds, excuse me? Do you think maybe you could eat that sandwich later?

Frank

I'm starving. You didn't have nothing to eat in this show.

Let's get back to your... story-

Frank

Right, so these punks, I don't know if they wanted money, or they wanted something more sexual... but it's a lucky thing I had my pieces.

Your pieces?

Frank

(pulls out two guns) My guns! Anyway, I started blasting. Bang! Bow! I don't see so good, so I missed, then they ran away. I ran after them, bang! Tried to shoot them in the back, but I don't run so good either. Anyway, you guys all think I'm a hero, and I'll accept that responsibility.

Now, weren't you concerned that an innocent bystander may have-

Frank

Look, crime in this city is out of control. Thank God I went down to Gunther's Guns and picked up a spare. I don't think one woulda done it! I'm gonna go out and buy some more.

Okay-

Frank

And I think you should, too. Don't be a victim, it's time to fight back.