Doctor Simeon, sir, there's someone demanding to see you.
No callers, not in here, not ever. Did he leave his name?
Sir... it's Sherlock Holmes!
[The Doctor enters, dressed as the aforementioned character]
Oh, yes! Nice office, big globey thing. Now, shut up, don't tell me! I see from your collar stud you have an apple tree and a wife with a limp. Am I right?
[annoyed] No.
Do you have a wife?
No.
Bit of a tree? Bit of a wife? Some apples? Come on, work with me here.
I enjoy The Strand Magazine as much as the next man, but I am perfectly aware that Sherlock Holmes is a fictional character! Get out!
[to Simeon's servant] Do you have a goldfish named Colin?
...No.
Thought not.
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